How to Release Suppressed Inner Emotions
The unconscious or conscious ignoring of anxiety-provoking and unhappy, so-called “negative” emotions, impulses or memories is called repression. According to psychoanalytic theory, repression is a basic defense mechanism that unconsciously excludes unacceptable impulses and thoughts 1 .
In 1989, Gross defined emotional suppression as an automatic method that changes factors such as how and when people experience and express their emotions. In the case of suppression, the person does not change or suppress the emotional response that will occur, but rather does not show the emotions 10 .
The repression defense mechanism is a powerful mechanism that protects people from distressing and momentarily harmful emotions and thoughts.
However, although this involuntary defense mechanism prevents people from being harmed in situations such as traumatic experiences, it is dysfunctional when used in almost every emotional event and as a way for people to cope with every kind of emotion.
The basic purpose of this mechanism is to suppress the moment, emotion and life events that are difficult to face at that moment until the person gains emotional and psychological stability and then to face them by coming to light.
Contrary to what is thought, suppressing emotions does not cause any decrease in feeling negative emotions, on the contrary, it causes the negative emotions that are avoided at that moment to be postponed for a certain period of time and to emerge in the same or different forms in the future.
People often suppress unwanted memories, past relationships, traumatic childhood memories, strong emotions and disturbing feelings .
At the same time, the causes of fearful phobias, some impulses and some events that will damage the personal image can also be suppressed. These suppressed feelings often reappear in the future as physical or psychological symptoms.
Suppressed emotions usually stem from childhood experiences. People learn communication and behavior during childhood thanks to the people who raise them.
Individuals who grow up in a family where talking about their feelings, trying to understand the child's feelings, and showing emotions such as crying are considered normal behaviors do not usually use the method of suppressing their feelings 14 .
People who do not connect with their emotions, who are distant from them and suppress them, experience different and more distressing experiences in childhood.
People who grow up in a family where showing emotions is shamed, where emotions are rarely talked about, and where the child's emotions are ignored, often tend to suppress their emotions.
If the person's emotional expressions were criticized, if the parents did not see any positive or negative expression of emotion, if the person was not given the chance to express himself/herself.
if the person was frequently exposed to environments where emotions were ignored, the person has difficulty connecting with his/her emotions, does not know how to express them, and therefore resorts to the method of suppressing emotions.
People who do not show their emotions, that is, people who suppress them, have been taught since childhood that avoiding emotions is, for one reason or another, the safer and necessary thing to do.
In a family where emotions are not allowed to be expressed, emotions are suppressed, or the person is directly suppressed, the behavior of suppressing emotions becomes a habit.