How to Deal with Judgmental and Opinionated People
Throughout our lives, many of us encounter individuals who are quick to judge and share their opinions. These people often believe they have a superior understanding of situations and can feel compelled to "correct" your thoughts, choices, or behaviors.
It can be challenging to navigate these interactions, especially when someone tries to impose their perspective onto you.
To effectively manage encounters with such opinionated individuals, consider these five essential strategies, which are elaborated upon in my book titled "How to Communicate Effectively and Handle Difficult People."
Keep in mind that not all suggestions will fit your specific situation; therefore, feel free to apply the ones that resonate with you and disregard the rest.
When faced with someone who insists on sharing their opinions, it is crucial to respond in a diplomatic yet assertive manner. Use “I” and “It” statements to express your viewpoint without directly challenging theirs.
For instance, if someone states, “You need to think about the issue my way…” or “You’re better off following my advice…,” you can counter with responses like:
“I prefer to view the situation this way…”
“I’m comfortable with how I’m addressing this matter.”
“It works best for me to approach it this way…”
“It is important for me to handle this in my own way.”
These types of statements focus on your perspective and choices, making it harder for others to disagree directly. By expressing your own preferences, you assert your autonomy as an adult. If the person continues to press their views, avoid falling into a defensive stance or engaging in lengthy arguments.
Instead, simply reiterate, “It’s my choice” or “That’s my take.” Continue using these concise “I” and “It” statements until the person recognizes your unwillingness to engage further.
Say: “Thank You” to Terminate the Topic
A straightforward and effective approach to stop unsolicited advice is to say “thank you” in a firm manner. This polite response signals that you no longer wish to continue the discussion. You can combine “thank you” with an assertive statement for added impact. For example:
Using this technique makes your intent clear. Generally, those who are considerate will pick up on the cue and cease their insistence. However, if you find yourself dealing with someone who continues to push their views aggressively, it may be time to employ the next three strategies.
When diplomatic hints are ignored and someone stubbornly persists in discussing an unwelcome subject, take charge of the conversation by steering it in a different direction. You can do this effectively by asking questions about a completely unrelated topic that this person enjoys or is knowledgeable about.
Alternatively, in a group setting, shift the focus by directing a question to someone else. This tactic interrupts the flow of unsolicited advice and redirects the conversation, regaining control of the dialogue.
By making a clear and deliberate move to change the subject, you can often break the cycle of unwanted opinions and create a more comfortable interaction for everyone involved.