Santa's new years resolution

Dear Earthicans,

You all were a bunch of shits this year, even the nice ones were arseholes. So for 2018 I've got a new to do list and I've checked it twice, and you all better check yourselves.

Step 1: Work out

And then work out some more, work out until I transform.

Step 2: Become Balck Man

Let's face it, you all would be a lot more humble if I came down the chimney lookin like this. No more fat Santa jokes and stop leaving cookies out, Santa wants Protein not Carbs!!

Some of you might still be thinking, "he's not so tough, I can still take him". That's where step 3 comes in...

Step 3: Enlist and get combat training

Now in 2018 when I come down the chimney, don't wake up and go talk to me, don't even open a Fucking eyelid, I will know! You will get what you get and you better be fucking happy about it otherwise I might just have to school you!!

But otherwise have a happy new year everyone, hope it's a good one.

Sincerely,

Santa "Motherfucker" Clause

Src: 1, 2, 3.

_{Please note: the views presented above are not the necessarily the views of idikuci, idikuci just provided a platform for Santa to vent. Any and all enquiries regarding the above should be directed to Santa via the below address:
Attn:Motherfucker
2 Candy Lane
North Pole
Artic Circle
000000}