I like workshops. Not writing workshops but real ones with the circular saw blades on nails and drills and screwdrivers and chisels and shit. I like old coffee cans. Got one beside me right now. It’s an old Folger’s can and it looks great and shines red. I don’t know what’s in it. I think there are some screws and maybe a golf ball or something.

I would think that the best writing shop is probably one out in the country and is made of cement blocks. It’s a place you have to drive or walk to. There’s some straw on a hard dirt floor and a wood stove made out of a barrel. There’s old dolls that someone didn't want to throw away. There might be a rusted lathe on a metal table and some beer that was forgotten up in a cabinet. You can hear horses heerrr ha heeerrr ha herr. Stray dogs and cats come and look at you and make you feel guilty. You write on paper and use a pencil, sharpen the pencils with a knife. Feeding the strays your food gives you power. There’s a Pennzoil sign. Coyotes yap at night.

Now I tell you of a shop that’s more convenient but less advantageous.

I use Google Docs to write. I used to use Open Office but it’s too slow. The feature I like in Docs is the Research tab. I don’t do any research with it. I don’t like researching. But I like it because I can type a word in there and look at a ton of pictures of soft pretzels out the side of my eye while I write.

Other than that, I use Microsoft’s Notepad. I have a key sequence that brings it up. I have hundreds of notes. But I recently discovered Microsoft’s OneNote that is a better way of not making a mess and finding specific notes easy. You can set up different sections within OneNote to keep track of each scene or chapter.

This next method is essential. I would get no writing done without it. And it is simple. A TIMER. You can use any manual timer or something like 1-click-timer for Chrome. Once you begin using this method your productivity will soar like a goshawk. Set it for 25 minutes at a time with a 5 minute break between.

I have other things too that are only important to me. Magic rocks, rooster feathers, paintings of skulls. I’m sure you have those things, too. They give luck.

OH! And I use a notebook that I paid a dollar for at the dollar store. I take it into restaurants and never write there. But I write a lot in it before I go to sleep.

God natt!