Muck, the book. Day 5

Day Five

Fred woke up sprawled across the deck of the broken ship, his face pressed against a pile of Wood. For the first time in days, he wasn’t running for his life. He wasn’t being chased by Daves, Villagers, or a horde of Gobblins enraged over stolen bean soup. Life was good. Well… almost.

He sat up and looked around. The ship was a wreck—planks were missing, the mast was cracked, and half the floor looked like it had been chewed on by something very big and very menacing.

He pulled out his map. Scribbled next to the boat was a small note: "Repair boat. Escape. Profit."

Fred nodded. "Alright. That’s the plan."

With nothing but his Rock of Destiny, bread, and an absurd amount of coins (which were completely useless since every trader was dead), Fred set out to gather materials. He chopped wood, mined Iron, and even found some obamium lying around like legendary floor loot. Then, while searching for glue—because, apparently, ancient ship repairs required glue—he stumbled upon something unsettling. A massive axe stuck in the ground.

Fred scratched his head. "Huh. That’s weird." Then he heard a deep, guttural voice behind him.

"WHO DARES DISTURB THE COUNCIL OF GRONKS?"

Fred slowly turned around. Standing before him were three Gronks. Big. Green. Angry.

Fred gulped. "Uh… hello?"

The Gronks stared at him. Fred stared back.

Then, one of them pointed at the axe in the ground. "YOU TOUCHED THE SACRED AXE!"

Fred looked at his hands. "Wait, I literally didn't even—"

"HE HAS DESECRATED THE SACRED AXE!" another Gronk bellowed.

Fred's eye twitched. "Are you serious?"

The three Gronks roared in unison and raised their greatswords.

"OH COME ON!" Fred screamed as they charged.

Fred barely dodged as one Gronk swung, its massive blade carving a crater in the ground where Fred had been standing.
He chucked bread at its face. It did nothing. Fred rolled to the side and pulled out his night blade.

"Alright, fine. If you want a fight, then I’ll give you one!"

The next few minutes were a chaotic mess of sword clashes, explosions, and Fred screaming randomly. "ASKJHFLAJSHFLKJSDH!"

Fred leapt over one Gronk, slashing at its back. It roared in pain. Another Gronk swung—Fred barely blocked in time, skidding backward from the impact.

"Alright, new plan," Fred muttered, reaching into his inventory. He pulled out… a Chunkium Hammer.

"Oh yeah," he grinned. "It’s bonk time."

With a mighty swing, Fred bonked the first Gronk so hard that it went flying into a tree. The second Gronk lunged—Fred bonked him straight into the sky. The last Gronk hesitated.

Fred narrowed his eyes. "You want some too?"

The Gronk considered its life choices… then ran.

Fred stood victorious, panting, and hungry. After looting their camp (which conveniently had the Glue he needed), Fred ate some bread and then returned to the boat, exhausted but triumphant.

With all the materials gathered, he finally started fixing the ship. He patched up the holes, reinforced the mast, and even slapped on an unnecessary obamium upgrade.

By nightfall, the boat looked almost… seaworthy. Fred sat on the deck, eating a meat soup, gazing at the stars. Tomorrow, he would finish the repairs.

Then, he would leave this cursed island. At least, that was the plan…