The Woes and Why's of Tinder Dating

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So, I am 29 years young.  In my 29 years, I have managed to survive an 8 year relationship and a handful of short term relationships since that one ended in 2009.  We can talk about those experiences later, but today I'm going to tell you all about Tinder and why I no longer have it on my phone.

Meeting people in Nashville, TN is far from easy.  You would think with as many people as there are in this city in my age range that it'd be like fishing in a fully stocked puddle of a pond.  Wrong.  You have but a few options when meeting someone:

1- Bars:  Everyone who's been to a bar has either flirted, been flirted with, or has seen someone flirting near by.  Alcohol has this uncanny knack for making people so much more comfortable talking to strangers, so meeting at a bar seems to be ideal (until the next morning or afternoon...haha) In my personal experience, meeting at a bar has really only led to one thing that typically doesn't grow into anything much more than a good old fashioned f#*& buddy or friends with benefits type situation.  Maybe I will be proven wrong at some point in the future, but until then I will continue to explore alternative options.

2- Work: People meet their significant others at work all of the time.  Whether they fall for a co-worker, customer, vendor, etc...this is a place where you spend the majority of your time, so it would only seem natural that you may meet someone here that you are attracted to.  I have definitely done this.  I have dated a co-worker once and will never do that again, because when these things go south there are only two real options: a) someone has to quit their job or b) you both have to put your big girl panties on and learn to tolerate one another's existence for a minimum of 8 hours a day.  More often than not, option a is the one that seems to be the most common and least messy and I feel like it is rare to find a couple who've met at work and managed to stick it out long term.  On the other side of the spectrum, dating a customer at work can be equally as frustrating because when this doesn't pan out that person may still like to come into said workplace EVERY DAY just to make your life miserable (again, we will journey down this rabbit hole during a later post as well).  Final thoughts: Don't s$*@ where you eat....

3- Church: This one is my mom's idea.  This is the only place that I dated during high school.  I suppose that went well enough, but then again it was high school, so maybe I should revisit this option at some point.  

4- The grocery store, coffee shop, mall, and just about anywhere else in life:  Supposedly people have random dumb luck in these places and they find significant others while pumping gas.  Buzz feed likes to feed us these stories of people tripping over one another's dogs in Central Park and getting married two years later.  I am yet to see this pan out for myself of any of my friends, so this isn't exactly a route that I've spent much time searching within.

So now that we have discussed all of the traditional dating options, let's chat about Tinder.  I downloaded Tinder with the hopes of finding a new outlet for meeting people since the above options have not yet panned out in my favor.  The simplicity of swiping right when someone is attractive and left when they aren't seems easy and shallow enough for both parties to at least cross the attractive factor off of their list.  I recently swiped right for a guy who we will call Tom.  Tom had a chiseled jaw line, pretty eyes and looked fairly muscular.  His photos indicated that he was associated with the military at some point and his short bio informed me that he was in aerospace engineering school.  To me, this sounds like a solid win so far!!!! Good looks, good story, good direction, YES, sign me up!  We chatted for a about a week before we decided to go on a date.  He asked me to dinner and we agreed on a place to meet between both of our homes.  Before we agreed to meet, he asked if I wanted him to pick me up...thankfully I declined.  I arrived at the restaurant about 5 minutes before he did and I patiently waited just inside restaurant for his arrival.  A few people came and went and I kept my eye out for my sexy, toned, soldier man.  A few moments later, I felt a tap on my shoulder.  I turned around and looked not up at my beautiful prospect, but down.  Yes, I said down... My man looked much more similar to a boy and was a solid 6 inches shorter than me.  Help me, please....as if that wasn't bad enough when we sat down to eat, he ordered a $5 appetizer as his entree stating that he wasn't hungry enough for anything larger.  Politely, I followed suit and ordered a happy hour appetizer myself as well.  We ate quickly as the portions were very small and he inquired as to what I'd like to do after the date.  I just passed the question off and shrugged as I took a bite and avoided the topic.  The server brought the check and he laid his card out to pay and we quickly found out that it was declined.  Declined?! I'm sorry, but you brought me on a date, ordered appetizers not even entrees, no drinks, and your card was declined?!  Luckily he had about $16 in his wallet and he was able to cover the bill with that.  Please let this date end!!! I quickly texted my cousin while he was signing the receipt begging her to call me with an emergency and luckily she did.  My escape was beautifully executed as I told him there was a situation with her and I had to run.  I haven't spoken to him since...

Tinder!!!!!!! You were supposed to make this easier, not more difficult and messy!!! Whyyyyyyy?

So here I am, back to the drawing board again looking for the next innovative dating opportunity.  I keep telling myself it can't get much worse, but there have been a LOT of hilariously horrible experiences!!!!  I'll keep you posted.