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RE: IoT: Went to Watch Black Mirror, Found Myself on an Episode.
For the end user that is not practice at all given what you just wrote is a foreign language to some. However bundle the services you just mentioned into a nice little package and you have a product. A router with the option to add IoT devices with their stated purpose. Those categories would have a set of common IP addresses unlocked. I would personally purchase something like that and I am sure there is a tinfoil hat market for it.
lol Your probably right there, bet there would be a market for it, but then you would need to know addressing and such or outside control would be needed so I don't see much of a practical way of doing it either.
Remote access would be a must, or just scheduled IP updates. You could always just run your own DNS and have it connect through that.
True that might be the easier way.
Now you would have a single point failure. Figure how to put it on the Blockchain. ;)