An Open Letter To The First Man Who Broke My Heart

I had you since 2008, at a very young age I did not expect myself taking love seriously, but then you came. You entered my life in the most unexpected way. You bought sunshine to my blues and made me realized what genuine happiness is. We went to places I’ve never been before and did new things together. You spoiled me with long good morning and good night messages, late night talks, movie dates and surprises. I was happy. I’m so in love and I was so sure that our feelings were mutual.

But I was wrong. I thought we’re fine and good but maybe you lost your track and along the way you met her. She led you back in the path, but somewhere far from me.

Four years of love we had was shared with someone I did not even know, someone that was not included to the book we were writing until suddenly, one chapter you made her part of the story.

From that day I knew you were not happy, you were not contented and I believed you wanted someone else. Truth hurts and the most painful part was loving you while you’re falling for someone else. I still cannot understand why you made me believed that you’re mine but she also had you.

And then one day came, she didn’t wanted to lose you. Even I’m begging you to stop, she can’t take you out of her life already, I found myself in the middle of a battle to have you or let you go and be happy.

I loved you so much and I wanted to gave you the best, the real happiness that maybe you’re
looking for. I wanted you to grow and discover yourself. I wanted to complete you, yet maybe I was not the missing piece.

so I let you go.

I let you live the life that you wanted

I gave up my happiness for yours

I decided to end up our relationship even I am still madly in love with you

I wanted you to stay, but how?

Pain made me realized that one sided love is never healthy. I lost you along our way and lost myself during the heartbreak.

I stumbled and cried. I’ve been to sleepless nights thinking of you, wishing that you’re back in my arms. I slept with my heart teared into pieces and then I woke up the next day, I transformed. I became someone I don’t know, a person that I did not expect I will be.

I explored the real world which before I thought was all about you, I met temporary people, built new friendships and enjoyed my own company. I was happy yet vulnerable, I got to know what are play and fun mean.

However, I was still lucky, because during the time I was in my worst, someone walked into my life and choose to love me. He accepted me completely. He fixed me and introduced me to my new identity.

Six years have passed and I wanted to thank you. You we’re my greatest heart break and that made me stronger. It gave me a lot of realization about myself, my life and the people around me. Your goodbye introduced me to new faces, real friendships, and genuine love. Our relationship trained my patience and honesty and that helped me since then.

And because of you I learned to love unconditionally and forgive with no regrets.

Thank you for making me the strongest person that I can be. Cheers for the memories, I hope you are happy as I am what today.

God bless and see you soon.

Sincerely yours,
Mae