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RE: Original Story: Smoke, Chapter 1
It definitely draws me in. I would have liked more specific details about the creature, it feels like a plot device currently, but I expect that those details are coming in chapter 2 and I can't really know better than the author what the right rate is to dole out those details at. I liked the characters. They felt authentic. The old woman was the weakest though, feeling more like a threshold guardian than a fleshed out person.