Beautifully written, straight from the heart, and never call it failing! You did great to get that far but now need to change direction, nothing wrong with that!
As an aside I honestly believe that having children not only messes with our hormones...the pregnancy stage & thereafter, which throws us off balance, but also changes our perspective on life and what we want from it. Don't be so hard on yourself @jusipassetti, and just take it easy now, you deserve it. Better things will come your way, and any experience gained will be used in the future.
Thank you for kind words. I'm actually happy I went through it as I learnt a lot. Your encouragement means a lot to me as always and yes in life there are always better things to come.