forgive others....

http://www.radioislam.org.za/a/index.php/resources/library/172-zakaah/11761-sadaqah-virtues-of-spending.htm
excerpts from fazail e sadaqat.....
Allah says in Quran....
And vie one with another for forgiveness from your Lord, and for Jannah as wide as are the heavens and the earth, prepared for the righteous. Those who spend (of that which Allah hath given them) whether in prosperity or adversity, those who restrain their anger and are forgiving towards mankind: Allah loves those who do good. (AaleImran: 133-134)
which means.....

The Ulama have stated that certain Sahabah envied Banu Israel for an occurrence among them that, whenever a person committed a sin, he found it written on his door along with it’s atonement, also indicating the way it was to be carried out e.g. by cutting off the nose or the ear, etc.
The Sahabah Radhiallaho anhum envied them for the fact that the forgiveness of the sin (after the atonement), was certain, as they viewed the gravity of any sin so seriously that punishment for it here was considered not only light but enviable, compared to the punishment in the Akhirah. The incidents quoted in the books of Hadith regarding the
Sahabah Radhiallaho anhum clearly show that, when any one of them (out of human weakness) committed a sin, he would be overwhelmed by fear of its punishment.
Not only men, even the women felt the same way. Once a woman committed adultery and presented herself before Muhammad Sallallaho alaihe wasallam, confessed her sin and asked for its atonement, which was death by stoning; and that punishment was ultimately carried out. Why so? Because, the fear of future retribution for the sin committed was far greater than the fear of death.
It is said about Abu Talha Radhiallaho anho that once a thought of his garden disturbed his devotion in Salaat, so he gave away the garden in Sadaqah for the sake of Allah, and felt happy thereafter. His sense of values could not tolerate that the thought of a material thing should interrupt him during his prayers. Anything disturbing his mind during Salaat was not worth keeping.
Another Ansaari Radhiallaho anho had a similar experience. His date-palms were in full bloom. He thought of them in his Salaat: how finely the dates had ripened! Realising his mistake, he appeared before Uthman Radhiallaho anho who was then the Khalifah and related the story of his date-palm garden and offered the garden to be given away in Sadaqah. It was accepted by the Khalifah and sold for fifty thousand Dirhams. The money was spent on religious needs. Abu Bakr Radhiallaho anho once, by mistake ate a doubtful morsel of food, which he wanted to vomit out; so he went on drinking water and vomiting till the morsel came out. He did this for fear of allowing a bit of doubtful food to become a part of his flesh.
Numerous incidents of the Sahabah have been narrated in the author’s booklet, "The Stories of Sahabah". With such people, it was not surprising to be envious of Banu Israel who were informed of their sins and the atonement in order to have their sins cleared in this life. Alas! Today we, on our part, are so weak in this respect that it does not even cross our minds how serious are the consequences. Allah Ta’ala, by His grace and benevolence, for His increasing favours and rewards especially meant for the Ummah of His beloved Rasul Sallallaho alaihe wasallam revealed the above Ayat saying, "Hasten towards such good deeds whereby the forgiveness of Allah shall be readily forthcoming!" Sa’eed Ibne Jubair Radhiallaho anho in his explanation of this Ayat says that one must hasten, with ones good deeds, towards the forgiveness of Allah Ta’ala and for Jannah, the expanse of which is equal to the seven heavens joined together like a single sheet of cloth stitched out of several pieces and the seven earths also similarly joined with them.
Ibne Abbas Radhiallaho anho has also been quoted to say that the seven heavens and seven earths joined together as one, make up the width of Jannah. Kuraib Rahmatullah alaihe, a slave of Ibne Abbas Radhiallaho anho has said that he was sent by his master to a scholar of Taurah to ask him about the expanse of Jannah, as given in their Scripture. He took out the Scriptures of Moosa Alaihissalam, studied them, and said that the width of Jannah was as much as the seven heavens and seven earths all joined together as one.
Its length was only known to Allah! Anas Radhiallaho anho says that at the battle of Badr, Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam said,
"O people! Advance towards the Jannah which is as wide as all the heavens and earths put together".
Umair Ibne Hamam Radhiallaho anho said in astonishment, "O Rasulullah! Is the Jannah so large!" Muhammad Sallallaho alaihe wasallam replied, "Yes, indeed." Um’air Radhiallaho anho applauded it and said, "O Rasulullah! I swear by Allah, I shall be one of those who will go to Jannah."
"Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam remarked, "Yes! Yes! You are one of those who will go to Jannah". After that, Umair Radhiallaho anho took out some dates from his saddle bag and started eating them (for gaining some strength to fight). But he soon started up, saying, "To eat these dates to the finish would mean too long a wait!" He threw the dates away and rushed into the battle-field and fought till he was killed (martyred). (Durre Manthur).
The above Ayat commends the Momineen (believers) for their virtue of controlling their wrath and forgiving fellow human beings. These are superb qualities indeed! The Ulama have written that, if and when your brother (Muslim) commits a blunder, you should think of seventy excuses for his making that mistake, and convince yourself of the weight of those excuses.

If you are still not convinced, do not blame him but yourself, for being hard-hearted and unjust, and say to yourself, "Your brother had seventy reasons for the mistake that he had made but you did not accept any one of them". And if your brother himself presents any excuse, accept it.
Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam has said that one of the qualities of a Momin is that if he gets angry, he soon gets rid of his anger. Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam did not say that one should not get angry but that the anger must disappear soon. Imaam Shafa’i Rahmatullah alaihe has said that a person who does not show anger when provoked is like an ass, while one is like Shaitan if his anger is not pacified when he is approached.
That is why Allah Ta’ala Shanohu has said, "Those who control their wrath", and not those who do not get angry. (Ihya). Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam has said that when a person is capable of satisfying his anger but, instead, subdues it, Allah Ta’ala grants him peace of mind and ‘Imaan’. (Durre Manthur). Patience in the state of helplessness is common, virtue lies in showing patience when in authority. One Hadith says that nothing which is swallowed is more valuable to Allah Ta’ala than the anger swallowed by a man; and Allah Ta’ala Shanohu fills such a person with Imaan. Another Hadith says that when a person suppresses his anger although he is in power, he will be called forward on the Day of Judgement and, in the presence of all, told to select a Houri for himself.
Rasulullah Sallallaho alaihe wasallam has said that a truly brave person is not one who throws someone on his back but he who overpowers his own wrath. A slave-girl of Ali Rahmathullah alaihe Ibne Imaam Hussain Radhiallaho anho, when helping him to perform wudhu, dropped the water-pot injuring his face. When Ali looked at her angrily, she said, Allah Ta’ala has stated:
"And those who control their anger"
Ali Rahmathullah alaihe thereupon suppressed his anger, on which she recited,
"And are forgiving towards mankind."
He said to her, "May Allah Ta’ala forgive you." She then recited:
"Allah loves the Charitable."
Thereupon he said, "You are a free woman." Once a slave of Ali Rahmathullah alaihe, while carrying a bowl full of hot meat for a guest, accidentally dropped the bowl on the head of Ali’s son and the child died. Ali Rahmathullah alaihe told the slave that he was a free man and could go away, while he himself got busy with the burial of his infant son. (Raudh).