Why Positivity Isn't the Be-All and End-All of Happiness

Ask most people, and they will inform you positivity is the key to happiness. After all, speak and think negatively and you'll feel bad. Do the opposite, and you'll feel the opposite. It makes sense. However, the road to a happy life isn't paved with smooth stepping stones; it's full of bumps and roadblocks, and there's no other route to your destination.

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Too much positivity results in irrationality

Positiveness only results in the expansion of joy when it isn't a lie. Believe in sticking to the sunny side of the street? All well and good. Pretend you're there when torrents of rain fall on you, though, and you're in danger of looking foolish and upsetting your more rational mind.

You might imagine such sentiments are the cries of curmudgeons who don't recognize a good thing when they see it. Then again, perhaps cynics have a point. No matter how hard you try to make-believe everything's rosy when it isn't, your logical nature knows better. Your brain will fight attempts to bask in unwarranted positivity because it doesn't want you to be crazy. Nonetheless, there is a way to use positivity to your advantage, even when the sky is falling.

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When positivity works

Understanding how to use positiveness makes all the difference between your efforts working and failing. Foolishness - as in pretending you don't need to improve your situation - doesn't work. Looking for the silver lining in setbacks, however, does.

Therapists know recognizing life lessons can help to heal painful memories. No matter what has happened, or is happening to you now, you'll cope best if you notice benefits exist. Even dire events can make you stronger and wiser, and herein lie positive outcomes on which to concentrate.

Flexibility and the acceptance of unwanted circumstances you can't change can make you happy too. Therefore, if there's a thunderstorm when you're throwing a garden party, you can choose to laugh and dance in the downpour. Or, you can become grumpy and miserable. Whether positive or negative, it's up to you which you select.

While positiveness isn't the complete answer to happiness, it is your friend. Use it wisely, and it will serve you. Indeed, you can rewire your brain by channeling your thoughts and actions toward a rational version of positivity. Live in a make-believe world where the journey to happiness is easy, though, and you'll stumble over the setbacks you pretend aren't in your path.

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