Luckily, we do communicate quite openly and more so than that, I’ve made an effort in recent months to not let other things - or people - distract me from her. And the funny thing is that I fantasize less than I used to. I think, maybe, part of it was the way I was struggling to adapt to the confines of “married life” expectations...and I have slowly been accepting the reality that I am the sort of person who needs boundaries.

But, I am also like the neighborhood cats, who need to bound around outside once in a while. Funny thing, too, is that while my wife is definitely more traditional...she’s far less traditional than she was when we first met in Korea. Life in America, away from her parents, has helped her blossom. She’s definitely more open to my sexual proclivities and appetite than she used to be, though we’ve a ways to go.

One thing is for sure: Married life isn’t perfect, but I am happier than I was when I didn’t know who - if anyone - I would be going to bed with each night. I didn’t get married until I was ready for it (I’m 37 now, was 36 when we got married). I was once engaged to a girl from France, while living in Israel, at age 23. I definitely know I would’ve gotten divorced from her - we fought as often as we fucked, and the sex wasn’t good enough to make up for all the other shit.