RE: How a careless teenager turned into a (step)mom - Part 12 - The CPS-mill
The more I read, the more similarities I see between our stories. My ex (and is) very good at playing the victim role. In fact, my best friend's partner and my ex have a mutual friend. He was over at their house one day and said things about what he'd been saying about me and how I was keeping his kids away from him (yeah, now I do, because we moved to another country, but this wasn't always the case....every time he came to collect the kids, he made a big drama and when I said something about it, he would click his heels and leave! Without the kids...). When that friend was done, my friend and partner said: "OK, and now our side of the story." The guy was stunned. I have the feeling that even though at some stage, he did care for the kids, but now it's much easier to remain in the victim role and blame it all on me so people feel sorry for him. You handled things way better than I did. You felt sorry for him. In my case, the only thing I can say is that my ex is a total waste of space...
Ha same here!
A girl heard this guy tell his story about how he was mistreated, at a conference. She was really impressed and felt so bad for him.
Later on this girl became my sister in law.. It became clear that it was my ex-husband that she heard talking..
Boy, did she feel misguided!!
It's amazing how simular this stories are most of the time!
Sometimes I feel like this guys have a membership at this 'how-to-be-a-bad-husband-club' where they all get the same tips and tricks
haha, what a small world that your sister in law heard your ex talking about how badly you treated him (you should be ashamed of yourself: putting yourself and your girls before an abusive husband...how dare you). That's the problem though with people who like to play the victim, because they're so bound to that role, they will never find happiness unless they change their attitude. If it's never their fault, then there is no way they'll ever be able to move on. The thing is, I didn't make this mistake only once, I did it three times (only once married though..pfew). I know, I know, I must have been crazy. With my first (the one I married) even during the wedding ceremony (I was living in Vegas at the time, no, not Elvis...) I was thinking to myself: What the hell am I doing? Three months later I was pregnant and another 3 months later I went back to Holland...He's never shown much interest in his daughter since then, only the last couple of years, and even then he manages to hurt her by being an ass (telling her that he can't buy her anything for her birthday but then in the same sentence tells her he bought a brand new huge fridge!). He and 'the other one' have always blamed me for everything. I shouldn't have left (even though one was physically/emotionally abusive and the other emotionally abusive and just plain toxic for both me and the kids). It is never their fault...But you and me both probably take some of the responsibility since it was us who fell for it and were blinded. And that's how people can move on. Not by playing the blame game. Yeah, I think these guys have been on the same club for sure...or maybe should all sign up for the 'complain about your ex' club. LOL.
You're SO right!!
Me and some friends who also had a bad relationship with a guy had this 'club' years ago, named 'the-how-to-survive-my-ex-husband-club' 😂
We talked about the things we could do to those men..
Really childish, but we needed that right then.. 😁
Haha, it's like the ex-wives club :)
Yes..
I'm not proud of it 🙈