What is the Concept of Self-Sabotage and How Does it Affect Our Mindset?
Hello, dear Steemians!
There is a dangerous tendency among a group of particular people that I want to address in today’s blog post. Nowadays, the concept of self-sabotage is not a strange thing to hear.
Self-sabotage is a hazardous mentality that can leave you with a ruined life, where every slight of joy descends to a state of agony and fear, and where every drop of happiness is paid with the piety of our constant need for pain.
These words might have eerily confused you, but this phenomenon is more common that you would care to imagine.
What is self-sabotage? It is not strange to believe that human beings are constantly in search of happiness and tranquility.
Their contentment is measured by their expectations of how the world should treat them and how well they should do in their own personal life.
But a lot of us often deliberately do things that may not be in our best interest. We burn down the bridges behind us, destroy our relationships, and do things that we know are harmful to our personal and social health.
All the while, we know that acting in such drastic ways is not in any way good for us.
We push people away and destroy the possibility of healthy relationships before they are even started. We leave people, before they have a chance to leave us.
How do you justify this tendency?
What inner force compels some of us to act like this and do things that are not good for us?
This is the idea known as self-sabotage.
A lot of people are afflicted with behavior like this. They might not even know why they are doing it, but it is a factual ascertainable mentality in today’s society.
The main reason behind self-sabotage is our longing for pain. As said earlier, human beings are naturally attracted to things that are either beautiful or make them happy. All their lives, they are seeking happiness and joy, little do they know that their nature speaks of something other than that.
We have known pain, ever since we were small children. We have understood that as this is a life of joy and happiness, it is also one of suffering and pain.
So, we are constantly seeking that pain over and over again. For some of us, it is the only true thing that we have ever known.
Take a look at pessimistic people and how they approach their lives.
They are always thinking of worst-case scenarios in every situation. When asked why, they simply claim that thinking of the worst possible outcome will not leave them with emptiness and disappointment.
For them, hope is like the Achilles’ Heel that will eventually destroy them if they allow its existence in their minds.
The same could be said about self-sabotage. When you make sure that you ruin your opportunities, life cannot surprise you again.
To be hopeful is to understand that nothing is ever absolute, and anything is possible. You have as much chance succeeding as you have failing.
For some people, it is difficult to understand the truth of that fact. They simply prefer to ruin their chances, because they can do it with utter certainty.
That way, they always have control on what happens to their life. For these people, the idea of unimaginable is almost unbearable.
Come to solitude and peace with yourself. Life is difficult, and pain is inevitable. But you should never be afraid of it. Embrace your opportunities, and accept the truth of fate and chance.
This way, you may not be in control of what life has in store for you, but you will always be happier and more satisfied with who you are and what you are doing, as opposed to constantly and deliberately missing your opportunities and burning down your bridges because the truth might seem unfair.
A BIG HUG!
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Important Note!
I have been working very hard on this blog since the beginning. I have a very busy life but I am giving my best and believe me I have shared experiences that I have been coaching thousands of people and I know that the change of the Mindset should be daily. I am already grateful to see you giving upvotes to each other and you can see this with the fact that many already have 8, 9, 10 upvotes. But I'm sure that with the effort of all of us we will see a community with, more and more upvotes each others and for that everyone should get engaged so we can make it come true. I believe and we can! Resteem...
***Remember Community: Please, if you commented and upvote on a new post I did, please always go back to the previous one because if someone in the community commented lastly because of time zone differences it will be without your upvote and that would not be fair.
You all know the goal! We can reach: More and More Upvotes each others!
Attention!!!
I'm reading all the meaningful comments from the posts.
I am here making a list of all of you who have helped build this community by voting for each other who write meaningful comments and soon I will respond to everyone with comment and thank you all because I can already see this spirit being built in this Positive Mindset community and help between all of you.
You will receive my upvote in all material and brief comments I will do this in all the posts I am following very closely and I can see what the people who are generous and contribute to this legacy that I am trying to build with all of you can become reality in a short time.
AND
First of all, I would like to thank all of you, who are the most active and proactive in this community, showing your generosity and always with meaningful comments. From now on I will always make a list of these incredible people who have helped to expand our goal of growing ever more.
But I ask that if you are new around here you read many of the previous posts because they make it clear that we are building a community with respect among all, generosity and this blog is for those who really want to start moving their Mindset to positive and moreover be part of the growth of all of us who contribute to this blog. Please do not ask to include you in the list if you are just wanting upvotes because we want here people genuinely attuned to growth and good attitudes and as I have always said with Respect as the basis of all, generosity and positivity!
ABOUT OUR LIST!!! WE NEED GROW THIS LIST! LET'S GO TOGETHER IN THIS COMMUNITY - RESTEEM!
Feel free if you want to be included in the list of contributors to this community. Just ask at the end of your comment.
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Thanks All of You!!!!
Excellent review @chbartist and you are right, the sabotage itself is a very insidious and destructive thing. We all wish for happiness and on our way there will always be difficulties and problems, but we should never miss the opportunity to become happier, no matter how hard it will be and we need to achieve our goal!
El miedo al qué pasará, nos lleva a "arruinar" algunas cosas antes de que comiencen... El miedo a sentir dolor, hace que algunas personas busquen ellas mismas hacerse sufrir, para que "duela menos". Pero no se dan cuenta de que se están perdiendo de vivir lo maravilloso de la vida.. Que es poder arriesgarse a tener algo mejor, a disfrutar cada segundo sin pensar que malo puede pasar después, solo dejando que las cosas fluyan... Que la vida nos sorprenda... Siempre va a ver un poco de tristeza en cada sonrisa y un poco de alegría en cada lágrima, y eso es la vida, no es fácil, pero vale la pena vivirla.
Eso es cierto, el miedo paraliza, o también impulsa en determinados casos pero yo voto por el pensamiento de que una persona se siga así misma (sin compararse con otra con mejor o menor éxito en la vida). Es la comparación lo que puede originar el autosabotaje. El querer seguir formas de vida y comportamiento ajenos. Es mejor ser uno mismo con todas las limitaciones y ventajas que implica serlo, y que venga la autosuperacion por cosa de voluntad propia.
miedo a que me dejen y dejar primero para no sentir dolor, me siento un poco identificada
Dear @chbartist
In society there are some distorted mindset people who are angry with themselves. Such people are either disappointed with the failures in life or are victim of misconception, which makes them engage in self-destructive activities. As we all know, the path of life is very difficult. Grief and troubles are an indispensable part of life, then why do not we fight them bitterly? We need to recognize our existence and need to develop moral values in life that protect us from the ideology of this method. Anyone who has understood the concept of value of life, escapes from these circumstances. And this is possible only when we are moving forward towards our goal with positive thinking and do not let negative thinking dominate us.
Thank you
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wao, it is hard to believe that there are people like that, so nice that it is to live a moment of happiness to the fullest and enjoy it. The things that have to happen, just happen but that obsession of wanting to control things through pessimism, I think it's a disease, because you can have control of things so you can live better and enjoy life more, avoid things that can be avoided, but you do not need to fall into pessimism or self-sabotage.
I think It's human tendency and it becomes our of control.. as usual a nice post from you. Thanks @chbartist
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You hit it right on the nail. Some people, such as the old me, can be easily drawn to tragic. There is a false sense of being poetic and romantic from pain. The first thing people often choose to do when being upset is quit their job, putting themselves directly in a financial despair.
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Dear @chbartist
I am very pleased to be able to read and analyze this article.
Especially in my country Venezuela, hundreds of things happen in the day to day that produce that terrible outcome in the minds of thousands of people. Simply the most basic things for a human being have become extremely difficult, such as getting the daily sustenance for their homes. The lack of being able to have three basic meals is producing school absenteeism and, of course, severe malnutrition problems. The life of people has become a race just to get the basics to stay alive.
Among my group of friends in particular, I try to inject positivism, because we can not allow ourselves to invade our minds with these thoughts of self sabotage, which is precisely what produces having so many shortcomings in the day to day.
It is difficult for them to think that life is much more beautiful than what they are actually living.
I am sure that with the blessing and help of God first, we will soon be able to breathe another air in these latitudes, and many will have the opportunity to transform their minds positively and help the new generations that are formed to build a better country every day.
A big hug!
I agree @chbartist on each and every point , I understood the meaning behind those heavy words, simply we should learn to stay happy and get going on our goals. And yes it's the journey that matters.
it is very successful what you have described here, there is a tendency to see what surrounds us in a negative way, and I can tell that in social media it is more common than in a personal way, thanks for sharing your knowledge with the community, please excuse my english.
The other side of self-sabotage is fear of failure leading you to just not try in the first place.
Do you think self-sabotage can come from low self esteem? The constant thought process that one deserves less or terrible things and hence knowingly or unknowingly destroys their lives?