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RE: THIS has to stop

in #lifestory7 years ago

Thank you for your blog. I can recognize myself in the point. When I bring my awareness 'here' when these kind of moments happen, it feels really like poison is running through my veins, through my whole body. It's nasty and venomous, almost like a curse put onto you. What helps for me in those moments is either of the two: 1) accept it and observe it, 'yield to it' while staying in this 'space' that isn't a part of it - in a point of rooting where you don't resist. Or b) 'man up', stand my ground. Realizing this is not who I accept to be. It's like a stern teacher that doesn't fight/suppress it, yet WILL NOT allow to be overtaken by it. Who is in the directive here? Yet, sometimes I can get a bit confused as to which tactic is the 'better' of the two - and that's when I can get lost in it nevertheless. It seems a 'tactic' of the mind to confuse within this process... Yet, when clear, and taking one of either approaches, 'salvation' is always here. It's like we have to be warriors within this all - being clear about your approach and you intent - and then hold on, steadfast. Another thing within this which helps me is to enjoy the process. For these are the great moments of truth & testing of your standing. And when standing, you will prove yourself to be more than your fears and inner chaos. And I love that actually. But, indeed, sometimes it can get very difficult indeed. Especially when multiple (life)points/stressors play into one fear-system at the same time - smacking you in the face with all its might. But the point is that we should NEVER stop our changing processes, never give in, always be aware. It's the path of the warrior - it's the path of Self-Change. That's how I see it. And, tough as it is, I also love it. It's a way of life.