Quitting tobacco story - day 1

F! F**k! I’m angry! Hate everything!!!

I need to calm down. Hi, I’m me, I have a name that is irrelevant, let’s call me Peter. I’m a male over 30 and I’ve been smoking for over 10 years now. And I’m trying to quit, this is my first day without tobacco.

When I was a teenager I used to listen to K’s choice – I smoke a lot, and I didn’t get the song very well but it sounded cool. K’s choice is a Belgian rock band, if you don’t know them you should check them out.

I live in Bucharest, the capital of a medium sized country in east Europe, called Romania. Growing up here I got the sense that everybody smokes. I mean smokes tobacco, that brown leaves cut in pieces and rolled into white cigarettes. The white cigarettes usually come in very nice small boxes or packs. They have a nice design with beautiful logotypes. Cigarettes packs were the nicest package I could see sold in shops when I was little.

My parents smoked, all the time, two or more packs a day. They used to tell me that cigarettes are all bad but then that some cigarettes are better than others. Anyway smoking was something normal, acceptable for me growing up. So at very young ages I would experiment with tobacco, like in kindergarden time I would collect buds from the ground and smoke them with my friends, till we would eventually feel pukey.

At about 14-15-16 I would smoke in the bathroom at school, with the intention to get into trouble, to look cool for girls to notice me. The girls noticed me but also the teachers and eventually my parents find out so I had to stop this habit. Being threatened to be expelled from school was the reason I didn’t smoke anymore. 16 year old was like the last time I smoked as a child.

Then after high school, I went to an university and also I got a girlfriend. She was smoking I wasn’t. I want to blame her for me starting smoking again but I won’t because I did it not her, it was my choice.
So now after more than 10 years of daily smoking, I want to quit.

I have some very good reasons, like my eyesight is getting worse while smoking, and also my teeth are getting very bad and they hurt when I smoke. I cough a lot I have to spit a lot of brownish stuff from my throat, it just sucks.
The downsize is that without tobacco I’m very angry, everything sucks. Oh and my sense of smell is a lot more powerful and in return everything smells very strong. And I don’t mean that flowers smell nicer by the contrary everything stinks. People stink, the street stink, I stink.

I’m also very agitated and have a very negative view of the world around me. What makes this slightly better is me writing this text about how much it sucks to quit smoking.

So yeah, maybe I’ll continue writing stuff about me quitting tobacco, although it feels like I just needed to vent.

If you’re also going through this process of quitting tobacco and also have some bad feelings about it tell me about it in the comments. That’s it for now, yeah, upvote, comment, resteem, whatever.

Also offtopic, I would like to thank @scottychams for sending me 0.002 SBD for no real reason hahaha, thanks dewd.