The Most effective Ways To Overcome A love Breakdown

in #life7 years ago (edited)

Hello dear Steemians,today I'm going to present you ( from some books that I read and from the situations I experienced) some methods to overcome an emotional collapse.

It's not because your love story is over that your life is end.

The first thing you need to do is:

To Evaluate your love relationship.

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By being sincere with yourself, make an analysis of this relationship that has just ended. What did you like? What did not you like? Why were you in love? What did not you like about each other? What changed ? evaluate, in writing, the pros and cons of this love story.

For example:

+) What I liked:👍
she is very beautiful and my friends find her beautiful. I liked to call her 'my girlfriend' when I was with my friends. With her, I did not feel lonely anymore, and I liked that feeling of knowing that I really meant for someone.

(-) What I did not like:👎
she lied often enough. she manipulated me.
At the beginning of our relationship, I was on a cloud. Everything was pink. But the more weeks passed, the more things got worse, and the farther away from me. she had changed so much with me.

A small assessment of this kind can take a step back. It pushes to become aware of what was failing, to relativize your loss, but also to assume your share of responsibility. In this way, you will be able to start on a new basis, knowing exactly what you want and what you do not want, what suits you and what does not suit you.

The second step is "I accept, to reach the letting go!"

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We sometimes tend to refuse to accept that a real situation exists. Yet this acceptance is the key that will open the door for change and letting go. Denial of acceptance only increases the problems. To the problem we already have, will be added the problem of our refusal. This refusal of acceptance usually manifests itself in anger directed against oneself and others. The healing process of a broken heart is like a machine, and for this machine to work, it must be given fuel. This fuel is ACCEPTANCE.

"I exteriorize Her Negative Emotions"

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(-) Gulping yourself food and drinking alcohol every time you feel bad is a bad way to calm your negative emotions.
(-) Taking care of others' problems to escape your own problems is a bad way to calm down your negative emotions.
(-) Buying things you do not need and then regretting is a bad way to calm your negative emotions.
(-) To hurt people who have nothing to do with what is happening to you is a bad way to calm your negative emotions.
(-) You commit suicide is a bad way to handle your negative emotions.
(-) You avenge your ex is a bad way to calm your negative emotions.

On the other hand :
(+) Letting yourself go crying is a positive basic way to externalize and calm your emotions.
(+) Talking with positive friends is a positive way to calm and manage your emotions.
(+) Writing everything you feel and hurting you is a great way to externalize, calm and manage your emotions. This will make you enough good!

"I forgive !"

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Unless your ex does not respect you, devalues ​​you, robs you of money, harms your children or other serious things of this caliber, there is no reason not to forgive him. If your lover has left you, it may be because he does not love you in the same way that he loved you before. Maybe because his personality, his values ​​and his life goals have changed. Maybe, poor man, was not ready for a serious relationship with you. Maybe before coming into contact with you, he had doubts about the love he had for you, but he did not dare to tell you. Maybe because a remote relationship does not suit him. These are not crimes!

Anyone can make mistakes and anyone can make decisions that are not in line with what you want. They do not necessarily intend to hurt you. These mistakes and the choices they make do not make them repugnant

"I'm taking care of me! I have fun !"

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a walk, cooking, camping, reading, going out with friends, indoor gym, new project, new challenge, new experience, cinema, composing a song, spa, cooking, eating healthy, eating organic ... Even if you are going through a difficult stage of your life, there is one IMPORTANT element that you must always remember: never forget it, never neglect it, and even engrave it in your mind. This item: TAKE CARE OF YOU. There are a multitude of positive activities that can awaken in you the desire to be always happy. Give yourself all the subtleties that can make you feel better, and stay focused on the things that make you happy, not the ones that make you sad.

"I significantly increase my level of emotional autonomy!"

To live in emotional dependence is not to be responsible for one's own happiness. And, the mere fact of not being responsible for one's happiness leads to living in insecurity. And this feeling of insecurity leads to living in constraint.

thank you for your reading
cordialy, @mageofor