it is amazing how the tools of peaceful problem solving, so resemble the tools of the con. robert heinlein said that, "love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." when using tools like these, we must, first and foremost ask ourselves, what is the best path to the happiness of the person we love? sacrificing the truth for this is dangerous. it subverts our sincerity and becomes a tool of a manipulator. if we love someone we must not manipulate them. in love, we must always first, question our own intentions in the situation, and never become push button thinkers. our loved ones are more than a collection of buttons for us to push for the desired result.