The More Money, and Things That we Acquire The More we Want.
I won't pretend to know the psychology or science behind this fact but I do believe it to be true.
We all want to think of ourselves as people who wouldn't drastically change if we suddenly became wealthy but chances are most of us would. Not all of us, sure but a heck of a lot of us. I have seen people in my own life acquire money and gradually change. Their ideals change, they become more conservative, less generous, more greedy. It seems to me that the more financial success we get the more we crave MORE.
This is true even for myself. I am poor at the moment. Living below the poverty line still and disabled but I am slowly upgrading my tools and able to pay rent, and eat and I find myself just obsessing sometimes with how to get more successful. It may not be a bad thing in my case since I am poor but it almost feels....well like I said, obsessive and it makes me wonder at what point will I stop? Will I ever be satisfied? Would I be making $60,000 a year with all the new advanced gadgets and still wanting more more more? I don't want to be that person. I just want to be comfortable and I want to remember that.
How can we keep ourselves from becoming greedy?
Lately, I have been reading non-fiction books from different parts of the world facing extreme poverty and watching documentaries. This humbles me and this takes me out of the consumer mindset a bit. It makes me realize how much I DO have even as one of America's poor people. It makes me realize how many people just want a roof and food and would consider the many of the things I have luxuries. Heck, there are places where people don't have toilet paper.
I do want to keep striving for comfort. Right now I can't even take care of myself fully. I am not saying to just be satisfied with poverty but I want to know when enough is enough. I don't want an obsessive compulsion to obtain more ITEMS. I don't want to find myself constantly having to shop for new items. I want to be satisfied with less luxury. There are certain things other would see as luxury that I don't however. Such as, getting a nice PC and VR headset. This is because I am too disabled to actually explore outside and it drove me to such a depression after 2 years that I almost killed myself with frustration. So, I want a few things that I don't technically need. We all have some things like that and I think that's okay. But when you notice you are at a point where you just constantly want more I think you should explore that feeling.
What void are we trying to fill?
If I get really honest with myself I know that my desire to over-consume in any way is to repress feelings. To hide from negative feelings. Or to simulate positive feelings. But if a person is truly happy they find themselves not needing as many things. We need to identify what is lacking in our lives and try to make peace with that and work on that instead of compensating in ultimately meaningless endeavors like shopping.
I really love this Tracy Chapman song about this exact subject.
After reading this blog, I am sure that you have a brilliant mind and don't think like an ordinary person, your disability will never stop you in achieving anything you want.
In my opinion, the definition of poverty varies, in my country, there are millions of people who can't even afford food twice a day and there are people who have billions of rupees, yet the don't spend on the poor.
This is life and we have to accept it. I think a peaceful mind is better than having a lot of money in your pocket, yes money is important to live a good life but again it's not everything.
Keep up the good work!
Oh yes definitely the definition varies. I am reading a book about people living in a slum in India who have shacks made from rubbish. Being as I live in America for me the definition is not having my rent every month, having trouble buying food (my roommate helps with both a lot), and having no access to medical care. (I finally moved to a state where I can get medicaid because of my poverty level.)
I am working my way up though and I do think I am resourceful enough that I will eventually get by. I regular 9-5 was never my style anyhow. :)
Thanks a lot and I agree with everything you have said. You need some to be comfortable but it definitely doesn't trump love and experiences. I long to be back near my friends one day where I can live again in a full way.
You will @lauralemons and I pray you get what you want in your life.
Resteeming thi post as well.
There is a book called "Your Money or Your Life" by Vicki Robin that addresses the phenomenon of wanting something, getting it, then wanting something else, and getting that, with each time you get it, the level of satisfaction decreasing until nothing makes us happy. I see from your blog that you've been reading non-fiction about this topic, you may want to check it out if you haven't already.
Yes, for me to be satisfied with what I have. Instead of buying buying buying we could save save save as the rainy day always comes. Not too long ago my battery died and I noticed that it is an old battery now. It seemed like I just bought it, but no it even has the date of manufacture. Time goes by fast I guess. It so happened that I could pay for the battery as I usually save $20 a month for car repairs. I would like to save $50 a month for car repairs, but $20 a month is good for now.
Yes I struggle still financially and am in debt so I understand but also am trying to stow away a little nest egg. I managed to save $1500 and am investing it into a really nice PC for my work and then I want to build up rainy day fund. Like, if my kitty gets sick I need money to make her better ya know? Or if steemit earnings go way down I need to plan for how to make more rent at home being disabled so I want like 4 months of rent secured. :) Aside from that I don't want too many things. I like buying used books about once a month but that's usually about $12
Yes my cat got sick and I know that the vets charge $300 to $400 easily which I don't have. I just studied my cats breathing and looked up congested lung cause that is what she sounded like she had. Then that lead me to congested heart cause a congested heart will cause a congested lung. Well I did find a medicine that is more alternative and the reviews were good. So I bought it over the net. It was under $50. I thought my cat was going to die soon by the way she was breathing before the medicine, but now after I give my cat 2 doses a day in her wet cat food she actually sounds better. She still has breathing problems, but she doesn't sound like she is going to die soon like when she was really bad.
Oh no...I hope you're cat will end up okay. :'( Maybe eventually you will get to a vet also.
I had problems where I had to try alternative stuff too when my cat got bad worms from living with other cats that had fleas and I tried that diatamaceus earth or whatever in her wet food while making sure she was extra hydrated. It didn't work so I ended up having a friend who is an animal caretaker fix her up for me. <3 I was so lucky. Now I find myself wanting to take Mouse for a check up just to verify that she is healthy since she's about to be like 9 and I have had her since she was teeny tiny.
Yes, maybe a vet later on. I am pretty sure my cat will be ok. My other cat Sheba that I had from 1997 to 2008 had worms when I first got her. I couldn't figure out an alternative for that. So I did take her to the vet for the worms and that worked. In 2008 I inherited a cat called Lucky from my friend Michele that passed away that year. I would take Lucky to the vet. Lucky was getting old and had a hard time doing his number 2. In those days I was still working for AT&T (before my office closed and I retired in 2010) and would spend any amount of money on Lucky. I just wanted Michele to know I was taking care of her cat. In those day I had a few times of $300 visits. Sheba died in I think Sept of 2008 and Lucky died in October of 2008. Lucky was I believe about 17 years old. The bad thing about me inheriting a cat is that Sheba didn't like Lucky.
It is most definitely 100% true... things and money don't ultimately make us happy but the more we have the more we want.... give a kid at Christmas one or two presents and they will be happy.... give them 20 gifts and they will sigh and open them and toss them aside and when they get to gift 19 and 20 they will mindlessly tear them open and say "what else?" Same with us adults.
It really depends on the person. (I think)
Everything is a game, even life. Having a career, being highly successful and acquiring a lot of money are also games. The better you get at it the more you'll have to compete to get even better. Rich people hang out mostly with rich people. And poor people with poor people. Ever noticed that? :D
There's also a clear mindset difference. Rich people (those who worked their way up) are highly disciplined in their work, fully committed. I couldn't do that. They don't focus nearly as much on their weaknesses, but mostly on their strengths. They have a innate drive that makes them the first to get up in the morning the last to go home from work.
I used to think "damn rich people" at for some time, but the truth is I wouldn't succeed in being rich and successful in the way they are. I'm not like those people.
And I'm also no genius. I wouldn't get rich by inventing something either :P
I'm a normal bloke. And normal blokes don't get rich. For me simply "being" is tough enough.
But we are all affected by a competition. Whether it's our looks, our manners, our skills or the riches we acquire. The game never ends.
We can choose to not play it it, but it will still make us want more if we see the next person driving a porsche to work while you tell yourself you are happy with your bicycle.
That's how I see it :D
At an individual level it's tied to moods, yes. Getting new stuff usually makes us happy. If your life in general isn't happy - you aren't happy with your life - you start doing the things that make you happy the easiest: eating, shopping, drinking, cursing others for their happiness. Getting happy requires usually a lot of work - self-development mostly. Unhappy people might not even think about it that everything they feel starts from their thoughts and actions. You are the master of your own happiness!
And that's how I see that :D
It is also much harder for certain people to get ahead in life. I don't think all rich people are just better at getting rich. I grew up in poverty, horribly abused, and am now physically disabled. I work hard constantly but I have obvious disadvantages.
But my point was more that once you have a certain amount of wealth I really do think it becomes excessive and I don't think it brings happiness. I think greed is a big problem and I literally would never want a Porsche. I would want reliable transportation but I don't want really expensive things. I want to help people struggling.
Obviously this is shaped by my upbringing but for me personally a live with extreme wealth doesn't make me envious. I would like to be helping people and living in moderate comfort. :)
My dream is to open a home for abused teens and adults that helps them heal through art. I want money for stuff like that not fancy cars.
money doesn't make the person it only reveals what's in their heart. <3 That's a phrase I've heard from a few different top leadership teachers like Orrin Woodward
I like that saying. Thanks for sharing. :)
I liked the way you think about certain aspect of life.
I recommend you to watch this video:
and maybe to read this text on Steemit https://steemit.com/life/@pinkhyppo/what-does-it-mean-to-be-happy
😉😇
It's a TEDTALK!! I love TED. I just blogged about them. I will watch and check it out. Thanks. :)
Yes, I hope you'll like it ;) Can you send me link of that blog?
Hello Laura!
This is a interesting topic. I actually had the chance to get rich a few years ago but I found out that money can not buy you happiness. I just did not want to waste my time with earning money instead of caring about friends/sports/travelling.
Now I do not or will not earn as much as I could have a few years ago - But I do not regret my decision at all! If you want to know more don't hestitate to look up my "Introduce-me"-post where I go into more details!
Greets and keep up those good posts!
P.S.:
Thank you. I will go check it out in a bit. :) Having enough to live is necessary but at a certain point it just takes all your energy to be rich and takes away from more meaningful times as you said.
Greed is awful but it does exist. Money in my opinion is too strong of a motivator for most.
That is my point. I strive for enough to be comfortable and without stress but I hope I know when to reel it back.