How to get rid of TOXIC PEOPLE

in #life7 years ago (edited)

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People can be toxic in different ways, but regardless of what kind of toxicity they bring to a relationship, they just have to go. One toxic person in my life was manipulative of my time and resources, and another always talked about himself and how bad things continued to happen to him all the time.

Sit down and really think about the relationships in your life. Think about how you react to those relationships. Do you find yourself screening phone calls because of one or two people? Are you avoiding activities you used to enjoy because a certain person makes them miserable? These are signs that you’re in a toxic relationship.

Toxicity is the degree to which a substance can damage an organism. If someone is causing damage to your life, then he’s toxic and should be dealt with accordingly. People who suck the life out of you with negative attitudes, constant complaining, gossip, selfishness, or extreme dependency are damaging you in a way that can cause depression and anxiety.

You wouldn’t hesitate to cut toxins out of your diet, nor would you think twice before removing toxic substances from areas where your children play, so why is it that we are so hesitant to remove toxic people from our lives? The most obvious reason is that most of us like to avoid conflict and don’t want to hurt another human being’s feelings.

However, you need to have the courage to tell a toxic person the truth. Not only is this the only way to remove a damaging relationship from your life, but that person needs to have his feelings hurt so he can examine his life, face his own toxicity, and hopefully make a change. He may or may not change, but that’s up to him — not you. You can only change your own life by choosing who can be a part of it.

Freeing yourself of toxic relationships is not easy, but there are 3 steps you can follow that will help :):

Step #1: Establish Boundaries and Don't Apologize for Them

Boundaries are instrumental in maintaining your sanity and health. If people don’t respect your boundaries, they aren’t respecting you. Make a list of your own personal boundaries, and don’t be afraid to tell others if they cross them.

Step #2: Know that Toxic People Won't Leave Easily

Toxic people will not just “go away.” They may push back and become irrational, angry, or act like victims. Don’t beat around the bush or defend yourself; tell toxic people the truth and be consistent and firm in your decision.

Step #3: Recognize Signs of Toxicity in People

You have to learn to recognize the signs that a person is toxic, or it won’t be long before the seeds of toxicity develop stubborn roots. You must learn to protect yourself from toxic people in the same way you protect yourself from catching a cold by washing your hands and avoiding contact with infected people. Watch out for people who negatively affect your other relationships, invade your space, and take up a lot of your time. If a person makes you feel uncomfortable or unproductive, he’s probably toxic.

It’s Ok to Say, “I Don’t Want to See You Again”

Because toxic people are drawn to those who are empathetic and trusting by nature, it can be difficult for that kind of person to do what it takes to free himself. At first, you might feel as if you’re being harsh or mean, but recognize that it’s Ok to defend yourself and your sanity. If you value your physical, emotional, spiritual, and relational health, you’ll do what it takes to get rid of toxic relationships.

It’s important to remember that when you remove toxic people from your life, you’ll go through an adjustment period during which you might question your decision or rationalize the behavior of the toxic person. Be strong and remember that you are doing this for your own good — and for the good of your family. Negativity will eventually manifest itself physically and emotionally, causing a ripple effect that will impact both you and your loved ones.

The truth is that we need relationships, but we don’t need every relationship. Surround yourself with positive people who bring you up, rather than drag you down. You don’t have to sacrifice your sanity because you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings. You don’t have to be controlled by your own kindness. You can be a good person without bending to the will of those who damage you with their own selfishness.

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Hi, nice post once again i totally agree with your points but the one i would have loved to see is about being toxic to ourselves, when we deny ourselves of being who we really want to be deep down, or hold ourselves back from what will make us happy, or when we try to lie to ourselves we are the most toxic, i think we have to evaluate ourselves first, detoxify before we can carefully select the chaff out of our various relationships with others. Hi Jane 😊

WoOoW impressing... So good to write and so knowledgeable... Thanks for a great article blog... Toxic... Ye and you absolutely right as usual 🐞🎯🙏

Very good informative post and I don't understand why this does not get more exposure. You most certainly explained in details exactly what needs to be done to disconnect yourself from toxic people for your sanity. Being honest with someone is always best rather than leaving and not say nothing. Honesty is good for both sides even if the toxic person might be hurt him/herself, I had toxic people in my life I had to disconnect myself because life is too short to have people like that slowing you down. I try to help them realize their mistakes sometimes but the person does not listen so I just move on cause I did what I can. Good post and upvoted! :)

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