What is an inner child and why does a person need it?
The inner child is a part of our mind that holds our feelings, sensitivity, and creative energy. Alongside it, there are also a "parent" and an "adult." These are different mental states that shape how we make choices and behave. In simple terms, they are the roles we play inside ourselves. The idea of these states was created by Eric Berne.
Many people have come across his book "Games People Play." It was from there that the idea of the "inner child" spread widely on the Internet. Many search for their inner child, hoping it is a magical solution for life's problems.
But finding the inner child is not enough. It's just as important to understand and find your "parent" and "adult." Each of us has three mental states or "ego states": child, parent, and adult. These states can switch depending on the situation, and sometimes they are active at the same time.
It's important to choose the right state for each moment. Relying only on one state can cause problems. Using the most suitable state helps us adapt better and protects our mental health.
The "parent" is like an inner guide. It reflects the rules, values, and habits we learned from our parents and other adults. Its main role is to keep traditions alive and pass down moral standards. Sometimes, the parent state is called our conscience.
The "child" inside us holds our childhood thoughts, feelings, hopes, fears, and reactions. It drives our impulses, reckless actions, curiosity, and imagination.
If the child and parent states worked alone, life could be difficult. The child is sensitive, and the parent can be strict or judgmental. That’s why we also need the "adult." The adult is not about age but about a way of thinking. It helps us stay calm and make clear decisions based on what’s happening now.
Having a good balance among these three states makes life more joyful and fulfilling. We need to avoid only living through the child state. Many people lose touch with their inner child because they try too hard to follow the parent rules.
Missing the child part can have downsides. The inner child gives us happiness, emotions, fun, and a carefree attitude. If we ignore it, life can feel dull and grey. Acting childish all the time can also irritate others and cause upset.
Most of us chase success and material things. We rarely take time to connect with our inner child. Taking moments alone, away from goals and busy routines, helps us listen to that voice inside. This can bring us more happiness.
You can get closer to your inner child by remembering childhood memories. Looking at old diaries and notes can reveal what truly made you happy and inspired you. These memories hold the keys to genuine joy and creative ideas.