ARE WE RESILIENT PEOPLE ...? DO WE HAVE TO AFFECT OUR PROBLEMS BEING RESILIENT ...?
This word according to the Royal Spanish Academy comes from English. resilience, and this der. from lat. resiliens, -entis, part. pres. act of resilīre 'jump back, bounce', 'fall back'. Ability to adapt a living being to a disturbing agent or an ad-verse state or situation. and overcome them. In Physics it is defined as the ability of some metals to bend and then return to their original position when they are no longer applied to them. In psychology, it is worth citing the professor of Psychology at the Complutense University of Madrid, Gonzalo Hervás: "... When the flow increases considerably, the reeds of the rivers bend, without breaking and without breaking, and then return to their original position when the waters recover their usual appearance. "
This way of behaving before the problems of life is not genetic, it can be learned without being born with this way of acting before the events of life; It's a matter of exercising it and trying. In most cases, we can understand our degree of resilience when problems are presented to the extreme, that transform us, and it is in the way we face such situations where we notice our degree to a greater or lesser degree of being resilient.
Not necessarily people prone to be resilient communicate some type of faith or religious belief or conception of life, this helps to generate certain conditions of the resilient person, however, these beliefs taken to the extreme distort the resilient way of acting, since they generate actions rigid not able to change at some point, our point of view or rectify in some cases.
Similarly, the resilient person faces the problems and difficulties in a positive way, with humor and always looking for the positive side or take an apprenticeship of what happened.
To find out if we have the characteristics of a resilient person, I find it interesting to quote below the notes of the 12 habits of resilient people written by ROSARIO LINARES. November 17, 2014 http://www.elpradopsicologos.es/blog/resiliencia-resilientes):
- They are aware of their potential and limitations. Self-knowledge is a very powerful weapon to face adversity and challenges, and resilient people know how to use it to their advantage. These people know what their main strengths and abilities are, as well as their limitations and shortcomings. In this way, more objective goals can be drawn that not only take into account their needs and dreams, but also the resources available to them.
- They are creative. The person with a high capacity for resilience is not limited to trying to hit the broken vase, he is aware that he will never be the same again. The resilient will make a mosaic with the broken pieces, and transform your painful experience into something beautiful or useful. From the vile, bring out the precious.
- They trust their abilities. By being aware of their potential and limitations, resilient people trust what they are capable of doing. If something characterizes them is that they do not lose sight of their objectives and feel sure of what they can achieve. However, they also recognize the importance of teamwork and do not lock themselves in, but know when it is necessary to ask for help.
- Assume difficulties as an opportunity to learn. Throughout life we face many painful situations that discourage us, but resilient people are able to see beyond those moments and do not faint. These people assume crises as an opportunity to generate change, to learn and grow. They know that those moments will not be eternal and that their future will depend on the way they react. When faced with adversity they ask themselves: what can I learn from this?
- Practice mindfulness or full consciousness. Even without being aware of this millenary practice, resilient people have the habit of being fully present, of living in the here and now and have a great capacity for acceptance. For these people, the past is part of yesterday and is not a source of guilt and distress, while the future does not overwhelm them with their share of uncertainty and concerns. They are able to accept experiences as they arise and try to get the most out of them. They enjoy the small details and have not lost their capacity to be amazed by life.
- They see life with objectivity, but always through an optimistic prism. Resilient people are very objective, they know what their potential is, the resources available to them and their goals, but that does not mean they are not optimistic. By being aware that nothing is completely positive or negative, they strive to focus on the positive aspects and enjoy the challenges. These people develop a realistic optimism, also called optimism, and are convinced that no matter how dark their day is, the next day may be better.
- They are surrounded by people who have a positive attitude. People who practice resilience know how to cultivate their friendships, so they are usually surrounded by people who maintain a positive attitude towards life and avoid those who behave like emotional vampires. In this way, they manage to create a solid support network that can support them in the most difficult moments.
- They do not try to control situations. One of the main sources of tension and stress is the desire to control all aspects of our life. That is why, when something escapes us from our hands, we feel guilty and insecure. However, resilient people know that it is impossible to control all situations, have learned to deal with uncertainty and feel comfortable even if they do not have control.
- They are flexible in the face of changes. Although resilient people have a very clear self-image and know exactly what they want to achieve, they also have enough flexibility to adapt their plans and change their goals when necessary. These people do not close themselves to change and are always willing to value different alternatives, without obsessively clinging to their initial plans or to a single solution.
- They are tenacious in their purposes. The fact that resilient people are flexible does not imply that they renounce their goals, on the contrary, if something distinguishes them is their perseverance and ability to fight. The difference is that they do not fight against windmills, but take advantage of the current's sense and flow with it. These people have an intrinsic motivation that helps them to stand firm and fight for what they propose.
- They face adversity with humor. One of the essential characteristics of resilient people is their sense of humor, they are able to laugh at adversity and take a joke out of their misfortunes. Laughter is your best ally because it helps you stay optimistic and, above all, allows you to focus on the positive aspects of situations.
- Seek the help of others and social support. When resilient people go through a potentially traumatic event their first objective is to overcome it, for this, they are aware of the importance of social support and do not hesitate to seek professional help when they need it.
I believe that we all have, to a greater or lesser extent, the characteristics of a resilient person. It is a way of dealing with problems with a positive perspective. Knowing when it is useful to face the impossible or not. As an example, the case of ROBLE and BAMBÚ comes to mind in a storm; the first of them, which is one of the strongest trees with deep roots, are torn by the root storm; Something different happens with the bamboo, which because it is so flexible, before the storm bends preventing it from being uprooted, and returns to its original position after passing this.
Give me your opinion, are you a RESILIENT person?