12 is, well, a whole bunch. More than my fragile temperament is designed to handle. But it warmed me that I was not alone in this struggle, and it resonates with me when you commented that now that they're here, you couldn't imagine no having them. Which would we choose not to have let into our heart? Doesn't make it easier, but I believe it gives the struggle and sacrifice meaning. I'm so far out of the box in this regard that we've burned the box to heat our hovel. But... We are warm.