One rule to rule them all when it comes to knowing yourself

 

We all heard before that one of the first things we should do on the road of improving is knowing ourselves. That’s a very very good advice but it’s much like that silly tutorials where you’ll learn to draw something complex and it skips a few very important steps ( so you’re basically screwed ). This “rule” that I’ll share with you does exactly that, it exposes to you those missing steps! It’s a very simple and yet powerful way to know yourself better.

If you read my description, then you already know that I’m a big time Quora reader, so this rule that I’m going to talk about I actually found it there, written as a part of an answer that I actually didn’t bookmark ( my bad ) and can’t find it anymore. I do remember who wrote it though and that’s James Altucher, a great blogger, investor, writer and so much more (check him out at jamesaltucher.com ). So… what are we actually talking about? 

 

You’re the average of the 5 people you spend time with. 
You’re the average of the 5 thoughts you have the most . 
You’re the average of the 5 types of food you eat. 
You are the average of the 5 things you are most grateful for. 
You are the average of the 5 things you are reading today.  I’ll add one: You’re the average of 5 of your biggest lies.

It sounds simple, right? Actually, it is, but it’s a little more to it than that. Let’s analyse what I just wrote.  Basically, you are the average of the 5 things you do the most. I wrote it here how I read it, but the list can be extended to 10X5 or whatever you want in my opinion. Longer the list, better the results. But the concept is so simple and powerful that I just couldn’t forget this one.  Let’s go further a little more into the “rule”, ok? So… You’re the average of the 5 people you spend time with. This is true, but you shouldn’t take it exactly as it is because it depends. There are some variables. “What if I work with the most *****g **** man, but I need to do it for my family?” you may say. That man probably isn’t as bad as you think, but clearly he’s not one of the 5 you would want to be with most of the time and he just could simply NOT be a part of the ecuation. The trick here is to analyse a little further and change the perspective to a larger one. In this particular example you may observe more than one thing: You may not have the will power at this particular moment to ch ange your workplace or try to address the problem with someone that could change your position ( you can see how this man is relevant to who you truly are in that moment? ) or there are no options for you other than that position and you truly need the salary to support your family (which means you are ready to sacrifice yourself and your comfort for the well being of your family), so you are an altruist.

 The point is the rule works almost every time but it needs to be looked at from more than one point of view and you need to understand what it truly tells you. The original form of it it’s really just a base for what can be transformed in a very complex idea on the road of Personal Development. For example, I added another field to the original: You are the average of  5 of your biggest lies. Can you see what I did there? It’s very counterintuitive to talk about lies, but you just can’t overlook it, because even though it feels like you’re just wearing a mask for a short period of time until things will be better, it’s not actually that. It’s a lot more, because lying is still a part of our lives ( I will write an article about lies, what do they actually mean and how can a lie affect our lives ).Like I already said, you can alter it as much as you want if you understand the concept. You can mold it so it reveals the missing pieces from your knowledge about yourself ( which, by the way, should not be addressed only one time because we are in a constant state of change, even though we are the same at the core ).This clearly isn’t the only and probably not the best way to find out who you are, but is a very simple to understand concept. It is the fourth time when I say that it’s about the concept and it should not be followed as a strict rule ( I respect James Altucher and this is how he named it, so I wrote it like that ). I really hope that this can help you as much as it helped me and hopefully more than that!

I should mention that this was posted and written by me on my blog, selftweak.com

Hope you enjoyed it,

Cipi