SLC-S24/W6 - Powerful Debate | Yes or no/ pros and cons

Assalamualaikum my fellows I hope you will be fine by the grace of Allah. Today I am going to participate in the steemit challenge season 24 by @alexanderpeace under the umbrella of steemit team. It is about powerful debate of yes or no and pros and cons.

Do you believe in having expectations and setting boundaries in relationships? Yes

In every meaningful relationship romantic, platonic, or even in professional love, understanding, and freedom are vital things to follow. But love without limits can become suffocating. Understanding without expectations can lead to being taken for granted. And freedom without boundaries may allow disrespect to flourish.

Yes I strongly believe in having expectations and setting boundaries in relationships. And I say this not only from wisdom but from experience.

Real-Life Story: The Love That Overstepped

I once had a friend named Summiya. She was a kind and devoted woman who fell in love deeply and fully with a man named Shahzaib. When they began dating Summiya believed love should be unconditional. She did not want to appear demanding so she avoided placing expectations. She never said what hurt her and she accepted every behavior. She accepted even when it chipped away at her self-esteem.

Shahzaib seeing no resistance began to slowly overstep. He would go days without calling, cancel plans at the last moment, and dismiss her feelings by saying, “You’re too sensitive.” Summiya would swallow her pain tell herself love required sacrifice and continue giving without limits.

Eventually Summiya lost her identity in the relationship. She felt empty not because she loved too much but because she never dared to ask for what she needed or draw the line when her heart was being hurt. The relationship ended not because love disappeared but because of there were no boundaries to protect it.

Image by Наталья Карташова from Pixabay

After the heartbreak Summiya went to therapy. She rebuilt her self worth and learned that boundaries are not walls. They are bridges of self-respect. And expectations are not selfish they are guides for mutual understanding. Today she is in a new relationship one filled with clarity, communication, and yes, healthy expectations.

Boundaries and Expectations; Pros and Cons

Let us break down the advantages and disadvantages of having expectations and setting boundaries in a relationships.

Image by Eddie K from Pixabay

PROS of Expectations and Boundaries

1. Clarity and Communication
   Boundaries help each person to understand what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. Expectations guide behavior. This eliminates confusion, frustration, and assumptions.

2. Self-Respect and Mutual Respect
   When you express your boundaries you teach others how to treat you. It builds respect not just for you but within the relationship as a whole.

3. Prevents Emotional Burnout
   Relationships without limits often lead to one sided giving. Boundaries ensure that both partners are contributing equally. It endures one is not draining the other emotionally.

4. Promotes Accountability
   Expectations create responsibility. If both partners agree on certain standards such as honesty and commitment then they can hold each other accountable with fairness.

5. Builds Trust Over Time
   Knowing limits of each other and meeting mutual expectations creates consistency. This consistency breeds trust which is the foundation of all healthy relationships.

6. Encourages Emotional Safety
   With clear boundaries partners feel safer expressing vulnerability without fear of judgment or invalidation.

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CONS of Expectations and Boundaries

1. Unrealistic Expectations Can Hurt
   If one partner expects perfection or places demands based on fantasy instead of reality then it creates pressure and disappointment.

2. Rigid Boundaries May Create Distance
   Boundaries should be firm but not like the bars of prison. If they are too inflexible then they can stifle intimacy and create emotional walls.

3. Fear of Conflict
   Discussing boundaries or expectations can lead to uncomfortable conversations. They can cause arguments especially in a relationships where communication is weak.

4. Misinterpretation of Control
   Sometimes people confuse healthy boundaries with control. A person may think If you love me then you should accept me as I am. That person does not realize that respect requires mutual effort and compromise from both the sides.

5. Vulnerability May Feel Risky
   Setting boundaries requires honesty. For some this level of vulnerability may feel too risky or unfamiliar.

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When Boundaries and Expectations Work Best

• When both the partners communicate openly and listen actively.
• When expectations are realistic, kind, and mutual.
• When boundaries are set not out of anger or fear but out of self-love and mutual respect.
• When there is room for flexibility, growth, and negotiation.

When They Become Problematic

• When boundaries are used as punishment or emotional blackmail.
• When expectations are not clearly discussed but are simply assumed.
• When one partner uses the other’s boundaries as an excuse to withdraw emotionally or avoid accountability.

Final Thoughts

Setting boundaries and having expectations in relationships is not about controlling someone else. It is about guiding both partners to a healthier and more balanced connection. It is not selfish to expect love, respect or loyalty. It is not wrong to say that This is what I need or This is something I ca not accept.

Relationships do not fail because people want too much but they fail because people settle for too little without ever speaking up. So yes I believe in boundaries and expectations. Not to keep love at a distance but to keep it honest, safe, and strong.

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I invite @wuddi, @pandora2010 and heriadi to join this contest.