Joke 1

NEED COFFEE!!

Original post: http://bit.ly/2GHI8Vl

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Joke 2

Crotchless Underwear: A Womb With a View

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Joke 3

A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.

"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.

"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know that I'm going to shoot him!"

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Joke 4

Q: Does the size of the penis matter?
A: Yes. Although many women believe that quality, not quantity, is important, studies show this is simply not true. The average erect male penis measures about three inches. Anything longer than that is extremely rare and if by some chance your lover's sexual organ is 4 inches or over, you should go down on your knees and thank your lucky stars and do everything possible to please him, such as doing his laundry, cleaning his apartment and/or buying him an expensive gift.

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Joke 5

A teacher said to her student, "William, if both of your parents were born in 1976, how old are they now?"

After a few moments, William answered, "It depends."

"It depends on what?" she asked.

"It depends on whether you ask my father or my mother."

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Joke 6

A man is out with his rowboat when suddenly a passing speedboat raises huge waves and the mans oars fall overboard!

He is stranded out in the middle of the lake!

After about 2 hours he sees another rowboat going by with a man and two women in it!

The first man yells "Hey buddy...can I borrow one of your oars??"

The other man yells back "They're not whores...they're my sisters.

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Joke 7

Top Ten Signs New Yorkers Are Getting Too Fat

1. Elevators have a maximum occupancy of one

2. The Statue of Liberty is now holding a cupcake

3. Driver's license photos larger to include all chins

4. Broadway's Shubert Alley renamed Kirstie Alley

5. Robotic voice in the subway says, "Stand clear of the closing doors, lardass"

6. Thousands of "potholes" are actually footprints in the pavement

7. 97% of ATM passwords are either "fudge" or "bacon"

8. People becoming Yankees fans just for the slimming pinstripes

9. Most popular store: Gap For Tubby Dudes

10. New Yorkers are winded after giving the finger

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Joke 8

Q: Did you hear about the cannibal policeman who was arrested?
A: He was caught grilling his subjects.

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A true artist

Original post: http://bit.ly/2GF72op

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Originally post at: https://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2018/02/daily-jokes-from-sydesjokes-for-10-feb.html

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