Pre warning .... this is dark humor
There once was a priest in a small Irish village who reared cocks and hens. One day as he was was tending to his feathered friends and he noticed that 2 of his hens and a cock were missing. Now he had heard there were illegal cock fights being held in the town. Being a man of the cloth he thought better to wait and address the issue at the next Sunday Mass.
So the following Sunday he went ahead and said his ceremony as usual and all the towns folk were there to hear the word of the lord, just before he said his final amen he decided to address the problem.
" Just before we finish today it has come to my attention that there has been some illegal goings on in this town as of late"
All the clergy started looking round at each other a bit nervous all humming and hawing.
"Settle down please.... Now when i ask my questions please stand up if it relates to you......Now how many of you have a cock ?"
All the men stood up
"No No No I mean how many of you have seen a cock?
All the wives stood up... The priest was getting annoyed now
"jesus almighty no I mean how many have you seen a cock you shouldn´t have"
Half the ladies stood up
"Ah here the lot of ya how many have seen my cock for crying out loud?!"
All the alter boys stood up !!