Biggest Mistake I have Made in Crypto

Good Evening,

I was debating if I should write this or not but I believe it is important I express what I have gone through these two weeks.
I have no one to really confide in other than one person. So your probably curious what did she do wrong?

So it began mid December I began to invest in bitcoin and litecoin just 500 dollars. I saw my investment go up 30% and I was so shocked. I though oh how easy! I then decided to invest my leftover scholarship money from school in hopes of gaining some profit. I invested in tron at 4 cents and cardano at 59 cents. A newbie mistake I purchased at an all time high saw the crash and lost 900 dollars of my money. Two weeks later I witnessed tron and cardano reach its all time highs which devastated me, if I just held on! This time I was adamant to try again. Invested more money gained what I lost then the 9k bitcoin dip happened. I observed charts by different TA specialists. One stated iota was going to 43 cents! I got honestly scared and expected an 8k dip to happen. I converted everything into tether.

I waited on the sidelines waiting for the 8k dip....which never happened. I saw the coins recover and I began mentally abusing myself. Losing 4 thousand dollars......it made me go insane. I didn't go to class, I was constantly crying every day feared for the judgement of my parents. I obsessively began going on Binance to look at the prices of alt coins. Everyday telling myself how stupid I was...if only I have held all my positions I would have never dug myself such a deep hole. I was in desperate need to recover my money.

My mood changed drastically. I isolated myself...cried in the bathroom at school. I couldn't even start on any of my programming projects. I lost ambition. I felt like a failure. Writing this the emotions return. All I wanted was to help my parents. Seeing my 52 year old mother come home from working at Walmart, and my 54 year old dad all tired from cooking countless meals at a cafeteria broke my heart. I invested in hopes of having a return which would leave my parents happy as a small thank you. Instead I burned the 4000 dollars into ashes. I felt so guilty, sick and nauseous.

I began having anxiety attacks which left me shaking on the kitchen floor which I have never experienced before in my life. I began taking medication to which only left me emotionless the first few days. I have dropped two classes, which I have never done before. I am a 4.0 computer science student therefore I have always been punctual. I did not know what I was getting myself into. I invested what I was not willing to loose. I was immature, and clueless. Now I am paying the price.

My parents found out, of course they were devastated. Living in a family of six it is my responsibility to provide help as much as I can. I have used my leftover scholarship money every semester to help my parents pay the bills and help pay for my older sisters student loans. They viewed me as the most responsible child....therefore they were destroyed by the reckless decisions I have made. They viewed it as a gambling addiction.

It will take time for these wounds to heal. I still cry every night in the darkness. I learned my lesson. Through these dark moments I try to stay strong for my parents and siblings. I would prefer to suffer alone in silence.

Thank you for reading. I honestly wish you all the very best.
I'm going to go off to cry and eat more ice cream. As usual junk food always helps.

BTC: 17xctaP2DrBwH5UsiHQKyy7RiToxhdg3wm
LTC : Le5HFZuMFyRN8zigSKSMUaZBvMe7JKjQnv