WinterBeast (1992) Review + FilmsteemCreated with Sketch.

in #horror3 years ago (edited)

Rating: 2/5
AKA: ClayFighter 64 III: PlaidBeast
Watch Here: https://www.bitchute.com/video/742riyWEl5BN/

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“I’m no homosexual pal!”

You ready to get down and dirty on the mountain, boy?

How about some top notch killer Claymation monsters….like this:

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Then head on down to the Wild Goose Lodge and treat yourself fool! We got snarky, gentle, lispy seniors telling period appropriate jokes & jazz synth.

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“If you think that’s bad her sister was twice as fat”

You got some off brand Tom Selleck rolling up as mountain Ranger, trying to stop Indian Clay Demons from straight wrecking the local plebs.

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I mean he’s got moves, but most of them are falling down and running in to shit.

Movie moves fast, real fucking fast.

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Breakneck scene transitions up in this beast, bitch!

That Sheldon guy running the lodge looks like he would be dope to hang out with, shame he gets emasculated by these badge wearing spergs.

FINAL WORD –

MRHELLBOX: I don’t see what the problem was. Summoning demons to terrorize the mountain seemed to be boosting tourism.

There was only a couple of Claymation fights so just a wasted opportunity. Just like typical meddlers, they had to go and fuck it up. Oh, I guess the titties were nice too whatever! - 2/5

DRUNKEN MASTER: These fools want to go bear hunting next time. I guarantee the final boss they killed in this movie was by complete accident. Good Luck with bears you dicks!

Oh yeah, Sheldon's musical montage was kinda cool, not gonna lie! – 2/5

PRINCE PECTORALS: They closed down Sheldon’s place right when he was going to attach a gym/swimming pool on to the lodge.

These guys are damn lucky they “saved” everyone, otherwise they would have been dolled up for Sheldon’s bone collection. – 2/5