Ebb and Flow

in WORLD OF XPILAR • last month

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Good Morning Lovelies šŸ’› Some days, I wake up feeling like I’m ready to conquer the world. Like I’ve got my ducks in a row (or at least, most of them), and life mostly makes sense… and then, on other days - Well, let’s just say the ducks are missing, lol and I’m standing there wondering if I even owned any ducks in the first place, haha! But you know what… That’s okay!!!

For many reasons which I don’t care to get into… I have been doing my best to be a little kinder to myself lately. To stop expecting some impossible version of perfection that some people have almost made me feel is ā€œnormalā€ over the last few years… and to just allow myself to BE. To exist as I am, in whatever state that may be. Happy, sad, frustrated, tired, excited… it does not matter! In many ways, I think we have been conditioned to believe that we always need to be happy, always need to be productive and always need to be ā€œdoingā€ something. But emotions don’t work that way… (well, mine don’t anyway, lol) - and neither does life.

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Some days are light and easy going and some seriously feel like trying to walk through knee-deep mud, but the reality is… both are a part of the journey - important parts actually, even if they are uncomfortable at times… in fact, I would go as far as to say ā€œespeciallyā€ when they are uncomfortable.

As ridiculous as this may sound to some people… I actually used to feel guilty when I wasn’t at my best. If I was having an off day, I’d push myself to snap out of it, slap on a smile, and pretend everything was fine. But the plain reality is that pretending doesn’t actually make the feelings go away - it just buries them and as most of us have discovered at one point in our lives or another… buried emotions don’t disappear, they just pile up… waiting for a moment to resurface.

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So I’m learning to just sit with my feelings instead of fighting them. To allow myself the grace of being human. Remembering that I’m not a machine pre-programmed to function flawlessly every second of every day. I am a perfectly imperfect person and people have good days and bad days - high moments and low moments. The more I lean into that truth, the lighter everything feels.

You never have to force yourself into a better mood. Just be gentle with yourself. Life ebbs and flows, and you are not broken just because you’re feeling a little wobbly, lol. We don’t expect the ocean to be still all the time. We don’t get upset when the seasons change. So why do we expect ourselves to be in a constant state of sunshine? You’re allowed to feel it all. The good, the bad, the overwhelming, the in-between. And you don’t have to justify any of it. Sooooo, on that note - have a lekker day, no matter what kind it ends up being!

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ā¤ā¤ā¤

Until next time...
Much Love from Country Bumpkinland, South Africa xxx
Jaynielea

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Fighting or suppressing feelings doesn't help at all. I haven't known such variations for long (I've always felt very balanced), but I accept them: they have positive side effects. You have to be able to allow them... What I find bad, on the other hand, is that you wake up more and more often and something hurts. Menno.