Tell Your Story #16(Broken Bonds And Shattered Trust)

What happened?

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Hello Steeminans, have you ever been betrayed by a friend how did it feel?

Deborah and I have been close friends right from senior secondary school, we happened to be in the same arm which was SS 1 E. We started off as classmates then there was a connection and we became very close friends. She had a boyfriend then while I didn't. We were always getting into trouble together, playing together, in fact we basically did everything together then.

Our Ss3 was really when our bond was felt the most as even teachers asked if we were siblings as we would always be found walking together, she was 3 years older than me but that wasn't a problem, as she never felt disrespected around me because we were in the same class . I was smarter than her so I made sure to always help her in her academics so she can do well too. We passed our WAEC with flying colours and graduated.

After graduation we still kept in touch and she told me she brought with her boyfriend and I asked her why, she said he was going to school in another state so she had to end things as she would not be able to keep a long distance relationship due to the fact that she loves attention. I asked her if that was what she wanted and she said yes so we moved.

We got admission into different courses so we started schooling but still communicated and met during our GST because it was for all freshers. I met this friend a guy who is Marvellous, I knew him before we started schooling but starting school rekindled our bond. We were always walking together and people thought the guy was my elder brother because He was so nice and protective, my friend Deborah never got to meet him yet.

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One day Deborah sent me beautiful pictures she took in school and I posted it on my status on Whatsapp, Marvelous saw the picture and said I should share her contact, I didn't hesitate to share the contact with him, I was even excited that they'll get to meet each other. After few days I noticed Marvelous stopped talking to me I got worried because we had never quarreled before. I tried asking him what happened but he ghosted me, I later stopped text and moved on. All this happened in our year one first semester. I was still in touch with Deborah, we kept communicating even though I never told her Marvelous stopped talking to me. I finally moved on and wasn't bothered anymore because my conscience was clear that I did nothing wrong to him.

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We finally got to our 200 level and I changed my phone so I lost Marvelous contact. I saw a message from a strange number and I replied, he started apologizing but I felt like I needed an explanation because the switch was too fast, we decided to meet in school, a part of me was so curious to know what happened while a part of me felt like he didn't deserve my audience. I met him in a seat out in my faculty and he was still apologizing but I insisted in hearing the story. He narrated how he dated Deborah because she claimed he loved him, I was shocked because Deborah was older than him as we were both the same age. He said after he agreed to date her, she told him a lot of bad things about me that he was shocked and did not believe, then she told him never to speak to me if he wanted the relationship to continue. He told me all what Deborah said about me and the were all lies, I even called other girls that we attended the same school to speak to him and the were shocked at the level of betrayal because we bonded so well in school. I was shocked and I cried myself to sleep the whole night because I trusted so much. He kept on apologizing but I was already broken to even consider being friends with him, because if I did not share her contact he would never have met her and to think she was the reason he ghosted me hurt differently.

I and Marvelous never really had intentions of dating but she felt like I was going to be a problem in their relationship that was why she asked him to block me after feeding him with lies just so he could hate me. After a while I couldn't hold it anymore I texted Deborah to let her know I heard everything, prior to this time I found out she broke up with him, and I felt like that was why he came back to apologize. Deborah had nothing to say but used the claims that she was in love which I refused to take as an excuse for betrayal.

I had to forgive her because I wanted to heal. I and Deborah talk but the bond is never the same as I see her as a totally different person and I'm scared of her. I started talking to Marvelous again but we just couldn't get close, the friendship died naturally and couldn't be revived.

What I Learned

Despite forgiving, I find it hard to trust anyone again because I was so hurt by Deborah's act because of a guy. I learned to be very careful and cautious when choosing friends and I also learned to limit the rate at which I trust people.

I also learned that winning back a lost trust is very difficult, as I and Deborah till date have never bonded, she tried a lot of means but I can't just let her into my space again.

I learned that a bond of over 5 years could be destroyed by greed because she was greedy. Marvelous was rich, she thought he would use the money he should spend on her on me. Meanwhile he never really spent on me and our friendship wasn't based on material things as I only got to know he was rich as we got closer. I got to find out that she never really loved marvelous but was with him because he was stabled financially.

This is how Deborah's greed led to shattered trust and broken bonds. I'm glad I got to forgive her because I thought I'll never forgive her.
It still hurts like yesterday.

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