Motherless Mother: My pain, my gain.

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Introduction.
The Genesis of being a mother in the life of the female gender, commence after the story of creation down to puberty age.
Puberty age, is a stage were alot of growth and development occurred in the sexual organs of the human system
After the development of the sexual organs, the female gender are capable of being pregnant and given birth. It is from this stage that their mothers try to inculcate the right knowledge in their brain following the expected changes that will occur during their physical manifestation of adolescence growth. At this point, there is the hunger of sexual pleasure/satisfaction, in the process, some of the female gender go astray following the wrong peer groups advice or shared knowledge.
It is from their encounter with wrong friends that made them to become motherless mothers in future.

ORIGIN OF MOTHERHOOD
The origin of motherhood can be seen from the Holy Bible following the creation of human race in form of God.
In First Book of Moses called Genesis: chapter 1 vs 26: 27: 28. "And God said, let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. 27: So God created a man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. 28: And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiple, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth".
These words brought to our notice, the first man called Adam and the first woman called Eve.
Interestedly, the word puberty was define as the "period of a person's life during which their sexual organs develop and they become capable of having children". According to Oxford Advance Learners Dictionary.
Furthermore, after puberty stage of life, the hunger for friendship and relationship will begin to appear in the life of both gender, most especially the female ones. Oxford Advance Learner's Dictionary, define Relationship as: "the way in which two people, groups or countries behave towards each other or deal with each other". Or "A loving and/or sexual friendship between two people".
At this point, both male and female gender begins to study each other. In the process of studying themselves, they learn from one another, they change from their previous self, they grow more in knowledge, they develop, they love each other and finally, they dream of getting united as one in the name of marriage.
During the process of studying each other, the female gender is gradually maturing to being a mother who will practically take care of her family when the time comes. At some point in their relationship, she asked questions and got answers she will definitely used in future. Having observe and understand each other, the next question to answer is, will you marry me? At times, the answer becomes Yes or No depending on what the case may be. When Yes, they partner together as one in-separated from each other following an oath of life biding them together.
In this new stage of life, both prayed and struggle to have a child and when finally she becomes pregnant and gave birth successfully, she happily rejoice and became a mother, who now have more duties and responsibilities to perform for the good of the child and her family. When she fails in her attempt to mother the child she gave birth to, she becomes a motherless mother.

MOTHERLESS MOTHER
Introduction.
When a mother becomes motherless, the children goes astray. The duties and responsibilities of a mother towards her children are too numerous to mention and that have always been the reason why anytime, mothers fail to carry out those responsibilities and duties nature demands from them, the children end up going into the wrong direction of life.
Generally, children are closer to their mothers and it becomes too easy for them to feel comfortable and share their problems and views with their mothers before meeting their fathers. They pay attention to whatever their mothers say and try as much as possible to see that they do that which mother instruct them to do. Mothers as well try as much as they can to defend and guide their children both in the right and wrong ways of life. The love and affection that exists between the children and their mothers strengthens the unity of the family.
Some mothers ended up becoming motherless to their children while still alive because of failing to perform their duties, in terms of not caring about their children, misleading their children through plans and actions that are not necessary, creating tension, causing confusion, hatred among their children or family members.

Who is a mother?
From the dictionary meaning, a mother is a (human) female who
Parents a child
Gives birth to a baby
Donates a fertilized egg or
Donates a body cell which has resulted in a clone.
Figuratively speaking, a mother is the source and origin of children. A child who found herself in a state or condition of being motherless even when the mother is living, experience hell. A mother, has the obligation to carry forward an assigned task to a successful conclusion. She is morally or legally obligated to carry out her duties and responsibilities in response to her children's situation.
What are the responsibilities of a mother?
Responsibility can be define from the military view as the obligation for the proper custody, care, and safekeeping of property or funds entrusted to the possession or supervision of an individual (JPI-02 Department of Defense Dictionary of Military and Associated Terms).
According to the University of North Carolina School of Education, "a mother is chiefly responsible for nurturing and rearing her children. A mother has an obligation to help her children develop strong moral principles early in life. The mother's presence and daily guidance in the life of her children helps to develop positive character traits with love and compassion for others".
From the definition of responsibility in the military view, relating it to the topic of discussion, a mother has the legal right to take care of her children, which is the proper custody. A mother keeps close attention, concern, maintenance and up keeping her children, indicating care. A mother protect her children from harm, damage, loss, showing responsibility of a guidance, representing safekeeping.
Causes of mother's neglecting their responsibilities.
Quarrel: when there is a verbal dispute resulting to one understanding incorrectly from the other. In some occasions, mother's usually quarrel with fathers following one or two issues that might rise up in the family. In so doing, some fathers feel reluctant in contributing to the welfare of the family using the quarrel as a means of punishing his wife. In response to this, some mothers felt intimidated and feel the best possible solution is to abandon her children and go away using it as a means of rewarding her husband's action. When this occur, she have indirectly fail her motherly responsibility to her children.
Humiliation: in some families, the fathers usually injures a mother's dignity and self-respect. Bullying the mother, making life unpleasant for her. At times, this might be as a result of the father planning to marry a new wife even when the first wife has all he want. Following this act, some mothers feel the pains and find it difficult to bear. This will amount to either leaving her husband and children to avoid further occurrence. In so doing, the children lacks the mother's affection.
Sexual Abuse: some ladies became mothers following their inability to control their sexual urge which manifested to unwanted pregnancy. Such ladies after given birth, they ended up not caring for the child, some of them will dump the child in front of motherless babies homes, some will send them to baby factories where ladies are being paid to give birth and abandon their child, some will used the child for rituals in exchange of power or wealth, while some will threw the child inside bush or river to die. Considering this act, those set of ladies, becomes motherless mothers because they fail to provide motherly care demanded from them.
Under sexual abuse, some mothers mingle among different sex partners and at every mingle, they got pregnant. After given birth to the child, they will drop the child to the father and continue their missionary journey seeking for more sexual pleasure or satisfaction with another partner. This attitude of some mothers can be qualified to be an act of prostitution. When a mother cannot tell how many children she gave birth to and the way about of those children, she automatically becomes a motherless mother, because she lacks the qualities of a mother.
Apart from the above mentioned points, there are little ways mothers fail's to perform their duties and when such happens, it makes them look stupid and useless. When a mother fail to share her love to all her children, she is acting out of her responsibility and making the hate ones feel motherless. When a mother continue to advice and support wrong acts displayed by her children, she is equally becoming irresponsible.
Have we thought of this? A woman who gave birth and abandon her child to die, a woman after given birth, sold her child out in exchange of wealth, a woman who have heart to use her child for rituals in pursuit of earthly desires. From the above thought's, questions emerge.
Who are those women?
Are those women mothers?

Effects of mother's irresponsibility on her children.
The survival of the children becomes a major concern when mothers fails to guide her children and the love that unites the family begins to diminish. Looking at the notion of the University of North Carolina School of Education, "a mother who shirks her responsibilities to her children may encourage them to go a wayward, destructive path in life".
When a mother becomes irresponsible, the child lacks so many things. Looking at the saying "Education commences at the Mother's knee and every words speaking within the hearing of a child tends towards the formation of character". Use this quote as an example, imagine the importance of motherly affection and consider when she becomes irresponsible, how will the character of the child looks like.
When a mother found herself in this condition, of not performing her duty, she becomes restless, she becomes guilty of her offences to her children and her conscience continues to accuse her of irresponsibility. This will affect the life expectancy of the mother, bringing worries, sorrows and unhappiness anytime she thought of it.
The reasons for Mother's Day celebration, is to appreciate our mothers in remembrance of all her efforts towards her children's welfare. To thank mothers for their love and care shown upon her children, and for the pains she bear during labour, including nurturing her children. In appreciating this love, the children in return present their gifts to their mothers, took care of them, show them love and provide her necessary needs. But when a mother fails to mother her child or children, she end up celebrating her day alone without the support and care of her children.
Interestedly, this is the time to think positively for mothers who misused their motherly skills not caring for their children. Think of what the future holds for you and your children, think of the pains and worries you encounter during pregnancy, think of what you will benefit from them at the end. Now, learn how to warm and comfort your children, apply patience in your actions and pray to God to give you the grace to endure, the wisdom and understanding you need to train your children, ask God for his blessings and every other thing you desire.

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