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RE: Why is this so hard???
I have seen a similar thing happen to my wife. Stress really is a silent killer. My wife has been highly stressed for years and up until about 2 month's ago she simply reached that breaking point. She can't drive anymore since she gets anxiety/pannick attacks, she's had pannick attacks at work and is still trying to recover.
The point is, as you've stated above, that it all reaches that breaking point, without any clear warning signs, then it is too late.
Yes, I do believe stress is at the root of many of our problems. We live in a society where we are surrounded by stressors constantly. I, like you, just want to see the people around me not just survive, but be happy sometimes. But sometimes you find yourself in a situation which makes it impossible for a while. I hope you wife is receiving help? I know it doesn't work for everybody, but yoga helped me more than anything else to cope with daily life. Thank you for your comment and I send my love and prayers to your wife.
We're working through it all, trying out a few different approaches. At least she will be at home for the next 6 month's. Finished off on the 15th so that has already been a major relief. Unfortunately we were just to late to avoid the anxiety so now we need to work through the after effects of being over stressed. Thanks for the response :)