How Meditation Helped Me Resist the Momentum of Negative Thoughts

One day, I was washing my dishes and I saw my housemates’ dirty dishes in the sink. It gets worse! When I asked everyone about it, everyone claimed that those dirty dishes didn’t belong to them. This put me in a bad mood. Later that night, I was taking a shower and I got irritated again just thinking about it. The next day, I was driving to work and I was still thinking about those dirty dishes. I admit it! Something as small and dumb as the dishes was ruining my day and I couldn’t even help it.

Meditation made me more aware of when I am dwelling in negativity

I used to think of our thoughts as something we have complete control over but meditation made me reevaluate this. In the meditation practice I follow, part of the meditation process includes focusing your thoughts exclusively on your breathing. When other thoughts pop into your head, you are supposed to let those thoughts go and return to thinking about your breathing. As hard as I try to not let other thoughts enter my head while I meditate, I can’t help it. They just pop in anyway.

This caught my attention. I figured that if I couldn’t stop thoughts from entering my head while meditating, I might not have complete control over my thoughts when I am not meditating. I started paying attention to the first thoughts that entered my head at any point during the day. I noticed that when my first thoughts were negative, they tended to gather momentum and snowball. If I got upset about the dishes, it didn’t end there. I would get pissed at traffic or dwell on how someone disrespected me. I realized that this momentum often took over and derailed my day.

Meditation helped focus on the things that make me happy

After I noticed this momentum, it became easier to push aside. When I am not lost in negativity, I occupy my mind with things I am passionate about. I think about things like how I can improving my technique in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu or how I can be more creative with my healthy cooking skills. It also gives me time to relive a great weekend I had with my friends. Thinking about these things makes me happy. Dwelling all day about small things that didn’t go my way doesn’t.

Meditation helped me think rationally

Resisting the negative momentum of my thoughts also helps me think more rationally when something is irritating me. I notice when I give into this momentum, it is easy for me to feel self-righteous and blame others. Going back to the dishes example, when I looked at things from my housemates perspective, I quickly felt less angry. I do believe I am great at keeping the house clean, but I realized that I do not always do my part when it comes to buying things for the house. How can I justify being angry all day at my housemates when I also fall short of our mutual expectations?

Just to clarify. I am not advocating that you be passive when things make you upset. When something is bothering me I do bring it up with people and I hope they do the same with me. The point is to not let a few small things that didn’t go your way distract you from positive things you have going for you.

How fighting the negative momentum helped me be more grateful

Fighting this impulse has helped remind me how much my housemates/friends have done for me. When I was sick and unable to care for myself, they took me in and drove me to the hospital 7 times a month for several months. When I lost my credit card and debit card (fail!) they went to the bank late at night so they could lend me money. When I was about to back out of making this blog, they listened to my fears and pushed me to follow through with this project for the right reasons. Thanks guys.

Parting words

Above all, meditation made me aware that dwelling on things is a waste of time. I am definitely far from perfect. I still get caught up with bouts of negativity from time to time but making it a goal to not fall into this pattern helps me get more out of life. There are times when I am driving to work that my mind races. During this state, I feel like I am thinking fast, productively and creatively and I am happy all at the same time. This sounds crazy but it’s true. This is the mental state that I strive to constantly be in. The only thing that stands in the way of that is myself.

Did something in this post resonate with you? How do you deal with small situations that sometimes take over your day? Mention it in the comments.