Game-changing Grain-Free (and gluten free!) GRANOLA!!

Granola. It has been done before. I've bought gluten-free granola before, you know, on road trips and such...it's a nice little novelty, I'll admit. But for me, the food snob that I am, I always was kind of rating the branded granola, thinking...
"yep, the millet in here does make me feel a bit like I'm a sparrow or a chickadee or something..." followed by, "I get it though--when you cut out pretty much everything that might contain gluten, you might find yourself desperate enough to add millet, which from what I've observed, not even birds like. Even they flick that shit on the ground by the bird feeder." But I digress. I eat the granola, acknowledge my food snobbery and move on. It fills the void.

But WHAT IF...
What if, I could MAKE something that could please my pallette, AND my fellow gluten-eaters? Well, THEN, then, I'd have something worth sharing.

Yes, this is a recipe blog post. I'm going to teach you a little grain-free alchemy. But first, I just wanna give you a little background my recipe inspiration. You know where the scroll button is, right? Feel free to scroll on down, friend.

In my family, my gluten-eating family, we have a cake recipe that is LITERALLY called "What-Cake." "Who's on First" comes to mind. But since I cut wheat out of my diet, I've made the recipe for the enjoyment of others, which does provide an element of pleasure for me, even if I can't eat it myself. But after making What-Cake for my hubby's birthday, I had a moment of "Why do they get to have all the fun?" (arms crossed, dissatisfied huff.) And then it hit me. EVERYBODY knows that what makes What-Cake special is the broiled, coconut, pecan, brown sugar frosting. None of those things contain wheat...and so I made myself a batch of the frosting, stuck that ridiculous goodness under the broiler, and WHAM. I had myself a dessert that made all my cake-eating family peer over to MY plate.

But as adults here, we know that if you eat frosting for dessert more than we ought, if you're past the age of about 25, these kinds of decisions start to add up along the waistline. You know that I'm sayin'?

AND SO, I decided to make something that captured the ESSENCE of that dreamy What-Cake frosting, but brought it down a notch. As in, you could eat a handful and not go into full-on food-remorse-mode.

This granola recipe is shockingly satisfying, fabulously filling, and if you don't mind me saying, falls nicely into the category of full-on food-porn. It's indulgent, yet makes a reasonable snack. THESE are the types of foods you need to know how to make if you don't want to become a jealous, forlorn, gluten-free gremlin.

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Here are the ingredients you're going to need, my friend.

Start by combining all your nuts and raisins and coconut flakes into a large mixing bowl. If you had some whole nuts, like I did, just pulse those in a food processor until you have small-ish bits. It's better to have nut pieces on the big side, rather than nut-dust (that word combo is a first for me), so go easy on the food processor throttle. This step should be really straight-forward. Don't overthink it.

Now, in a saucepan, add your 1/3 cup of butter and 1/2 cup of maple syrup. Heat it on med-high heat, stirring with a whisk until the mixture begins to bubble.

Go ahead and pour that deliciousness over the top of your nut/raisin/coconut mixture. Stir well.

NOW, this is where the magic happens. Granola alchemy. Real-food sorcery.

Turn on your oven broiler, and carefully spread out your granola mixture onto a baking sheet WITH sides, LINED WITH A SILICONE BAKING MAT. Please don't try to do this with perfectly flat cookie sheet. You'll spill way more than you ought to once we start the broiling process. And that would be a cryin' shame. Depending on the size of your baking sheet and silicone baking mat, you may want to broil this in two batches to avoid spillage. I like to live life on the edge, so I did it all at once. You make a judgement call.

Go ahead and put your granola into the oven and park yourself right on the floor in front of the oven, and stay there. I recommend NOT checking your facebook or instagram right now. You gotta stay focused.

Once your granola is in the oven, you'll hear it start to warm up. Particularly, keep an eye on the coconut flakes. They'll brown first. AS SOON AS YOU SEE browning on coconut, pull out your tray and fold the granola in the pan. You want everybody to get fair attention under the broiler, and you sure as heck don't want to burn anybody. That would be sad. Once you've gotten everybody rearranged, go ahead and put your tray back in the oven.

This is important. Because your granola mixture has already warmed, the browning will happen a lot faster each time you put it back in the oven. If you're rebellious and start looking at "taxation is theft" memes, you'll burn your granola. Personal liberty can wait. This process of broil, stir, broil, stir will happen roughly 7 times (or at least it did for me). My advice is to stir when in doubt. It's better to toast too little than to toast too much.

Once you have achieved your desired amount of toastiness, remove your granola from the oven and allow it to cool. Please resist tasting until it has completely cooled. Those little almonds hold heat VERY VERY well, and will burn the **it out of your mouth if you rush it.

But OH, when it's all done...OH...the magical taste. You are now a full-fledged granola sorcerer. You're welcome.

Thanks so much for joining me for today's recipe! Please leave me a comment to say hello, and if you'd be so kind, go ahead and upvote my post! Full-frontal hug.