Why?

December 25, 2021
God, I want to give him up but why does you show me why and why should I choose him

December 31, 2021
These past few days.. I don't know I am in the point of letting him go again.. because I have expectations like he should have time for me..Overthinking.. if the person loves he/she should have time for someone but I realized that matured person they have reasons but not because you are not important may be its about time if you love the person learn to understand them and don't judge him/her easily.
Last night I thought he would not come.. I almost cried because of frustrations... I told myself thats the last.. and I would never believe him but.. he came..

January 8, 2022
I don't know what to do anymore.. I went to church to ease my mind about thinking of everything.. breaking up.. giving up.. I'm tired of waiting..

Is it too much if I waited for a reply..
Is it too much if I want some of his time..
Is it too much to ask for a date even sa turo-turo lang.. (Even I pay for the expense its fine)

I'm thinking of going out of my own.. being not asfraid..
I don't want to be dependent to a person that doesn't value my worth..

God prepare me to be a better person more understanding..more fiercer and braver than before..