Bloodbath Kavkaz Review

Read this so you don't have to play it, because... What's not to love about this Hotline Miami ripoff? Well, anything and everything. But level 1 shapes our expectations perfectly.

We are a mercenary killer who is about to finish the job, but it's mission impossible out there: although there are no bad guys shooting at you yet, the collisions can make you ragequit!

See that double solid line on the street? It's an obstacle. You have to walk around it if you want to get to the other side of the road. They've turned painted lines into something you can't walk on.

I don't know how we're supposed to get inside this house. Couldn't figure it out. So how did I get inside it, only to get grenade blasted by the character we were supposed to finish off?

Well, our character's collision is a mess, so I tried moving towards the wall while rotating my character and... It worked. It teleported inside due to the crappy programming code.

Moving on, we're waking up in a hospital, we're bleeding out and a bunch of police expect us outside. We're busted. The game leaps forward in time and we're at our house, retired from being a mercenary. Some alien-looking blond guy forces us to work again.

I spend like 10 minutes trying to choose "skip tutorial" because the damned crosshair cursor is glitchy. After finding the exact spot I'm supposed to click, the game progresses again...

Gameplay is finally revealed. Don't get shot more than twice in a row, kill everyone, move to the next level. Sometimes go through some plot intermissions with really ugry character graphics.

Oh, and press CTRL to slow down time so you can kill a bunch of enemies without dying. But that's about it.

You can't buy this game anymore. At least not from Steam, because it's been removed from their store. That says a lot. So last but not least, I leave you with the original trailer:

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