#12-LAUGHING MY ASS OFF BIG TIME. Some of my favorite quotes, jokes,motivation,facts and true stories during my life time.
Posting daily 3 quotes, jokes,motivation, facts and true stories during my life.
I had a friend once. She was incredibly lazy!
Her name was Hope Slack.
WHAT WAS HER MIDDLE NAME? Answer at bottom of page.
Isn't it amazing how we at times become comfortable with our lives. We complain about the price of coffee, water and land rates, how miserable our jobs are, how unfair life is, horrible relationships. There is no end to the things that we complain about and yet we continue with our current lives as if we have consigned ourselves to believing that this is as good as it is ever going to get! I know of countless people who have continually complained of an issue. A real life example would be immigration within Australia. Currently politicians are debating weather they should allow more Muslims within the country. Many people strongly believe that the numbers should be decreased. I see almost on a weekly basis at my local bar, people complaining loudly and vehemently that, yes, the numbers should be lowered. These same people then become more enraged as they talk openly about the issue. It is not uncommon for statements such as "Fuckers should go back to their own country!" or " The only good Muslim is a dead Muslim!"
Yet for all their boisterous banter, these very people, have never written a letter to their local politician, joined a rally, protested, signed a petition, let allow organised a petition, written an article in the local paper. In fact, they have done nothing! NOW? Are these peoples opinions worthy of your respect? NO!
Unfortunately the world is filled with such people, who's opinions carry as much weight as shit rolling down a hill. Alternatively there are people who stride constantly to improve themselves and their communities. Often having to go, considerably outside of their comfort zone. NOW! These are the people that make change, progress humanity and enrich the lives of others. We all want change, be it to lose weight, become more healthy, gain financial freedom and a myriad of other wonderful things. However, to make these changes we often have to step completely outside of our comfort zones which scares quite a few people, but most times upon reflection, people often become better for it and extremely thank full for having made the change.
BE THE CHANGE. BE THE BETTER YOU! BE ALL THAT YOU CAN BE!
Are you the boofheads like those at my local bar OR are you the instrument for change. Let's make this a better world!
Mr Wilson has always had a small penis. One day he decides to do something about it. He contacts the local Penis Enlargement Hospital and is advised that they have Four package deals worth $1000, $2000,$5000 and $10,000. Deciding that any thing would be a major improvement on his current length of half a normal man's pinky finger, he decides on the $1000 package.
He arrives at the hospital and is told that due to delays, he will be part of two separate operations occurring at the same time. He meets the other man, a Mr Johnson who will also under go the same operation as Mr Wilson on a neighboring bed. The operations begin and the surgeons remove each mans penis and after several hours, successfully attach each man's new penis. Both Mr Wilson and Johnson wake up simultaneously opposite each other and both sit up on the edge of their beds. Mr Johnson- "So how did it go for you and do you mind letting me have a look at your new penis, just so I can get an idea of what a $1000 penis looks like. That way I can picture what my new $10,000 might look like. Don't really want to look at my one now, thanks." So Mr Wilson pulls down his trousers and flops out his new six inch penis at which point Mr Johnson lets out at first a little giggle but then he can not contain himself and break out in huge fit of laughter, he stumbles and tumbles to the floor, laughing even louder, that he attracts everyone's attention. With nurses, doctors and other patients scurrying into the room.
Mr Wilson- "What the hell is bloody funny?"
Mr Johnson- "That's my old dick!"
If you liked any of this post, check out my other funny post.
https://steemit.com/jokechallenge/@skytronia/funny-true-story-my-entry-in-the-weekly-jokechallenge
https://steemit.com/art/@skytronia/some-images-just-confront-you-with-its-brilliance
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