First off, stay calm and know that doors closing mean others open.

Second, realize this answer of random thoughts is from a nomad, so take it for what it is worth.

Why are these your only two choices in this entire world?

continue living in a city where housing prices are soaring to maintain our employment or return to our home town and seemingly start our lives over.

You have a needed skill, and I assume your SO does too. Throw a wide net of resumes in places you want to live without setting limits. Not every place is as expensive as where you are, and many are much less expensive.

Make a list of "must haves" and go from there. Look at this as an opportunity to grow and thrive.

Last I read from you - your workplace is not ideal. So here is your big opportunity.

We start our lives over every single day, but rarely think about that fact. You are lucky to get the opportunity :)