I became a murderer....

It was a beautiful Sunday morning, all was set for a wonderful service but there was a problem. Zira, our renowned chorister was no where in sight. Everyone looked around for her but perhaps it was obvious that she wasn't coming. The next focus was on me. I had always been the back up for Zira but not the lead.

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I was given the mic to take up worship but I declined. Who was I to match Zira? She does it better. I can't do it like she would. I would be a laughing stock because of my terrible voice, I shivered.
And so, the service went on without a worship session..
I felt so ashamed of myself that I couldn't stand in when Zira wasn't around. It was my chance to show off my musical prowess but I let FEAR get a better of me.

"You killed my spirit today" Pastor said to me as the service ended. The worship always makes me flow but......

I cried within me. This was my opportunity but I messed up

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"Fiona will put you guys through" I looked up as I heard the teacher call my name. "From the look of things, she seems to be the only one who understands, judging from the fact that none of you but her passed the simple test." He said, handing out our scripts.
They booked a date for the makeup tutorial and on the said day, I chickened out. What was I going to say to a crowd of over 50? Will they even listen? What if I flop and make a mistake? They'll definitely laugh at me.
Again, I lost my opportunity of taking my place.
I lost.
And each time I lose, it means I killed....

It's not like I intentionally chicken out, I just have a cold feet when I am supposed to stand up to responsibilities.

That is my FEAR.
Standing up to responsibilities.
And each time I fail to do so not just I, but others suffer..

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You are a light, destined to shine and make bright the path for others.
But what happens when you refuse to let your light shine?
Others suffer with you!

You are not a mediocre. You are a pace setter and a world changer/shaker. And until you put to use what has been deposited in you, you let others suffer with you.

Stop letting fear get a better of you.
Man up, or Woman up to those challenges and watch them crumble before you.
You are the driver of your life. Choose your destination wisely.