May 8, 2020 - Victory! Germany surrenders!
The victorious Swedes with their most prominent prisoner,
a defiant Merkel, still gesturing provocatively
Never in the field of human conflict has the once proud Germany surrendered so quickly.
Barely a week after the Swedish navy, under the command of King Carl Gustav, had landed in Kiel, the leader of the Corona fascists, Angela Merkel surrendered unconditionally to the royal couple in Berlin.
Swedish troops inspecting a demasted and demoralized Gorch Fock,
a shadow of her former self
Already in Kiel the Swedish navy had encountered little resistance by the German navy, which, crippled by corruption and female leadership and without the HMS (Her Merkel´s Ship) Gorch Fock, the pride of the German navy, stood no chance against the unmasked onslaught of the Swedes, but the Swedish move against Berlin was even blitzier than The Blitz in 1940.
Wherever the German troops encountered the unmasked Swedish forces they fled in panic.
German generals were shocked by the Swedes´ ruthlessness, and condemned the Swedish tactics of attacking without face masks as a clear violation of the Corona Convention Against Biological Warfare.
But in every village, in every town the Swedish forces liberated, they were enthusiastically greeted by the German population who tore off their face masks, and like Syrian women who burned their burqas after having been liberated from the brutal reign of the Islamo-fascist IS, the liberated Germans threw them face masks, the symbols of oppression and Corona fascism, on big heaps and burned them.
A triumphant Carl Gustav addressing the population of Berlin
So this morning a triumphant Carl Gustav addressed the jubilant Krauts in Tiergarten in Berlin.
"Long years ago we made a tryst with destiny, and now the time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure, but very substantially.
This pledge was Never again!
Never again, we swore, should a government enslave and imprison its own population.
A moment comes which comes but rarely in history, when we step out, from the old into the new, when an age ends and the soul of a nation long supressed finds utterance.
It is fitting that at this solemn moment we take the pledge of dedication not only to the service of Germany and her people but to the still larger cause of humanity.
And in this moment, today, once more, Berlin is free, Germany is free again!"
The crowd went totally mad.
After a while the King continued.
"On June 26, 1630, almost 400 years ago, another Swedish king, Gustav Adolf, the good Adolf,
twinkle smiley, stepped on German soil, to fight against the evil of those days, a tyrannical Catholicism.
Two years later, on November 16, 1932, he made the ultimate sacrifice and gave his life
in the Battle of Lützen, defending freedom of religion and freedom of opinion,
hell, freedom itself for Germany´s Protestants.
Me too, was prepared to give my life fighting this Corona fascism which has brought unspeakable suffering to the German people, but, alas, this was not necessary.
The German troops, already demoralized by years of incompetent female leadership,
surrendered quickly or fled.
Deep in their hearts they must have known they were not fighting the good fight."
King Gustav Adolf, Defender of Protestantism
"I am sure you are all eager to get to know what faith awaits your former leader and her cronies.
As an ardent student of history I know, her place to be is Nuremberg!"
The Krauts went absolutely bananas.
"I will personally make sure that she gets the maximum possible sentence, ten years of cleaning public toilets for a minimum wage, with all entitlement for a pension from her criminal political career cancelled.
This punishment will give her a deep insight into the real connection between viruses and the economy and the plight and struggles of ordinary people.
Thank you all for coming, breath freely and be well!"
Asked by a reporter what a victorious Sweden would now be expecting from a defeated Germany in terms of reparations, the King replied salomonically:
"It was brought to my attention that due to the inhumane actions of Merkel and her cronies some German beer breweries had to file for bankruptcy.
My heart goes out particularly to the Wernecker brewery which had to close after more than 400 years. They survived the 30 Years War, Two World Wars, countless tax inspector invasions, but not the ruthless rule of Merkel. This goes to show how truly evil these Coronazis are.
My troops will dismantle them breweries and resurrect them in Sweden, a classic win-win for victims and victors."
In a dramatic turn to the gore, we just now receive news that two of the most fanatical Coronazis, wanted for crimes against health, aesthetics and humanity, Jens Spahn, Minister of Health and Markus Söder, Chieftain of Bavaria, have committed suicide in their bunkers by hyperventilating into their face masks.