Self forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for throwing away the good thing in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate who I am within throwing away the good things in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust the saying if you love something let it go.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for doing stupid things that make my life more complicated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn my back on myself in the name of righteousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to cry because I can't believe all the stunts that ive pulled through my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate having to face the cruelty of who I am in my tunnel vision without thinking or slowing down.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear how insane I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide my evil from myself by just calling myself crazy because I don't want to believe I actually do some of the things I've done in my life creating stupid consquences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself so harshly when I've just been trying to figure things out at my own pace.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for having to create consquences because my pace in life is too lazy to get anywhere without consquences and risk.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use consquences and risk because I don't want to put the real work in.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel so angry I wish I could go into the past and yell at myself for being stupid and twisted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to despise myself for becoming so twisted in my head.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate slowing down for a moment and seeing the reality that there's consquences for my every move.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as sick in the head when I know that I'm trying my best and have good intentions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate having to even relate to myself from the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate that some of the stupidest thing I've done had been under the guise of a good idea.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to shove my good ideas down my throat.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to shove my good ideas down other people's throats.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wonder why people put up with me at all.

When and as I see myself regretting the shitty ideas I've had and tried to live, I stop, I breathe, I realize that I've learnt some lessons so hard and deep that there's no chance I will ever forget, thus, I commit myself to breathe, let go, and know that I only need to teach myself and that everyone else is responsible for thier own hides.