"SLC-S24/W2 - Powerful Debate | Love vs Capability"
My love and I
My dear moderator, co debaters, panel of judges, honourable time keeper I'm eliany and I'm here to debate on the topic that says: Can a marriage succeed without love, even if both partners are compatible and have great mutual understanding?
Marriage is a gift from above and it's originator gave us guidance on how to love and live happily and peacefully in marriage. Love leads to marriage, if you don't love your partner very well, you can not move to the next stage that leads to marriage. Let's do a little consultation to see what the originator of marriage told us to do.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous. It does not brag, does not get puffed up, 5 does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. 6 It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails._1 Corinthians 13:4-8
You understand this one right?
It simply gives the characteristics of love which means that once love is present, then every other thing is possible. But when love doesn't exist, it is hard to bear someone you don't love, you can't even endure anything from your partner you doesn't love neither can you even have an atom of good character toward your partner.
But let's check another word of advice to husband and wife.
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself, 29 for no man ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cherishes it, just as the Christ does the congregation, 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and he will stick to his wife, and the two will be one flesh.” 33 Nevertheless, each one of you must love his wife as he does himself; on the other hand, the wife should have deep respect for her husband. Ephesians 5:28,29,31 & 33.
This explains it all that love is the paramount when it comes to marriage. While the husband loves wife as his body, the wife should have deep respect for the husband and then they will remain happy.
Men do value respect so much, the way you talk, actions and suggestions should reflect respect to a man. Likewise women, they want to be loved so much and they can pour out the respect to the husbands.
So have you seen that the originator of marriage have the secret of family happiness?
We are imperfect but we loyally love each other
Two grown up imperfect adult can never live together without having issues but in cases where love is there, you can always adjust to each other so as to have a healthy and sound relationship.
All marriages begins with loving each other so intense that they decided to live happily together so they result in marriage. So why the fight with the person you love so much, why hurting the person you love so much, why sudden change after some years?
The point is that from my experience I E seen that so many marriages run out of love because of failure to upgrade and spices up their love for each other.
So withy explanation let's check out where we belong to in this debate.
Through your entry, move into that emotional space and show us: Is love essential to keeping a relationship healthy, or can loyalty and understanding hold a relationship for a lifetime?
Yes love is essential to keep a HEALTHY relationship
Point of emphasis is on a healthy relationship not just a relationship. While, loyalty and understanding holds a relationship for a life time but we can't refer to that as a healthy or a successful marriage.
Marriage mate should be your forever playmate
Remember when the originator of marriage says that "a man will leave his mother and father and stick to his wife" which means when it comes to love between two marriage mate, it shouldn't be compare to any other love, not even the love you have for your parent should interfere with the love you have for your marriage mate.
The love intimacy between two marriage mate is divine and shouldn't be compare to any family members or while dating
Therefore, love, loyalty and understanding work together to build the healthiest relationship for a life time.
What are your thoughts about being seen as the "perfect couple" for outsiders but truly having no feelings for each other and having a huge emotional distance?
I don't think it is ideal. Marriage mate should have feelings for each other but incase they realise their feelings has fade off, they should either look for a way to build it back or depart.
Staying together as a married mate without having emotional feelings for each other is not perfect at all. Such marriages has lead to insecurity which results in divorce or death of a partner.
I don't live a life to please anyone likewise, I don't advise anyone to pretend to be a perfect couple then they are wolf's behind close doors. What makes marriage a successful one is not what others sees, it is taking into practice just one thing. Husbands love your wife and wife should have deep respect for her husband. When love is there then the characteristics of love will be shown between themselves and they will live happily.
Therefore, in as much as there is no perfect couple, to have a happy peaceful marriage one need to heed the council given by the originator of marriage found at the cited scriptures above.
Is it wiser to hold on to peace or to chase what sets the heart on fire?
You can never be peaceful in a fire place so why chase what set the heart on fire? Hold on tight to what gives you peace.
My peace of mind
Meanwhile, marriage is a life time school without graduation and you know that forever is a very long time, so you don't need to be on fire rather you need peace to stay forever in the journey while continuing to learn and adjust to many things.
Conclusion
I can boldly say that some marriages can survive without love, if both partners are compatible and have great mutual understanding but it can never be regarded as a successful marriage. In any successful marriage, both partners must have loyal love and deep respect for each other.
I want to invite @m-fdo @wirgo and @dequeen to take part in this contest
