I consider you to be my friend and someone whom I respect because we share a lot of similarities. Sometimes when i read something like this that you wrote, i feel like i am reading my own diary. I think you will make it through this hard part of your life, and maybe begin to see the people who like and respect you. Your friends are waiting patiently.
I have some of these same things like pushing people away.......
I think you're a very talented writer, and you can make this superpower of yours even bigger.....there are few writers who are as good as you
Its interesting how connections form here. I could have never guessed we have so much in common when I first started reading your blog. <3 Thank you, Stella.
@inquiringtimes, thanks for sharing the reality of what's going on for you. I've only known you for a short time here but have really connected with your content and you know how that is - your content has made me feel akin to you. In any case, I'm so sorry it's been a rough time and addiction is such a beast to get out from under. @inquiringtimes
Hang in there man, life is hard but substance abuse makes it far harder, as you know. I'm sorry to hear you've been having such a hard time, but it's really good to hear you are looking up instead of down.
My god man, glad you are still with us. I quit drinking 4 years ago, it had been a downward spiral for some time. It's helped me get back into my productive mental journeys. Also, I think a lot of people that enjoy online communication aren't really "social" in reality, because conservation can be so annoying and pointless at times, whereas you can always pick and choose and control your focus online. Anways, keep working on yourself and i'll keep working on myself, it's a life-long process. Peace
meanwhile, you're a total social butterfly on steemit. I see your comments everywhere :) doin it right!
Thanks for the kind words. I'm around, exploring some ideas in my head about what I'd like to write. I've been doing tooons of research on bitcoin and the cryptosphere historically, academically, thematically through the years, and actually understand some of how mining works now! :) I might write about that sometime since I already have a bunch of prep done.
I was also thinking about neuroplasticity... that would be a good topic for me to reserach and write about :)
as far as the other stuff.... well, I spend a majority of my time deep in work and research, which is a healthy way to re-train my brain, I think. Socially... uh... I've been in a "curl up into a ball" faze throughout the winter... now that the weather is nice, I'm starting to stretch and realize I can't just be a hermit forever... as much as that sounds appealing at times.
Hi @inquiringtimes, thanks for sharing the reality of what's going on for you. I've only known you for a short time here but have really connected with your content and you know how that is - your content has made me feel akin to you. In any case, I'm so sorry it's been a rough time and addiction is such a beast to get out from under. Good for you for having the courage to take steps and embrace the kind support around you!
You'll have many rooting for you here on this platform- me included- and I wish you well in your emergence. I'd also like to offer the idea of using your friends here, and this forum to help support your process of growth rather than leaving it behind. Post as you can and as it's useful for you. It may not be a full living, but it helps and the potential for relationships and true connection does exist here. I now have several steemians in the flesh in my life and I like them just as much walking around as I did digitally. In some ways the kinds of connections we have here cuts through crap that stops us face to face, so we can connect more heart to heart rather than mask to mask. Anyway, just a thought. Be well and I look forward to more news from you.
Thank you. Yes, I still try to maintain some of the connections. Truth be told, I throw myself so strongly into everything that I do, that I simply don't have the time to throw myself into freelance, and keeping up a blog here. I will still be posting as available... in the future I may even re-emerge as a regular if I get more efficient at writing, or I've developed some other resources better.
Steem isn't going away. I feel good about the progress I made here so far, and I've still got plenty of sp so I'm not going to run out of bandwidth when I'm ready to hit the blog again.
Your past doesn't have to define your future @inquiringtimes. That is so true. And, your past may not be as bad as you think it was. It's all a question of perspective. When you feel shit it will look worse. When you feel better it won't look as bad.
I truly believe that you did the best you could with what you knew/thought at the time and will continue to do so.
Try and live one day at a time. Try and draw comfort from having a family that loves you without that having to mean that you need to do something different.
They obviously see something lovable in you and, while you may not be able to see that yourself, just trusting their judgement can bring it's own comfort.
I wish you all the best with whatever you choose to do now. 💙
Dan, it’s a precious act been aware and elaborate the past, doing it in this way is also a social act that maybe can help others thinking as well about their inner lives. From the moment I had the fortune to meeting you I felt comfortably speaking with you and understanding a different approach to the community. Also your attraction to learning is vibrant and contagious. Thanks for sharing and being present! Ciao!
My son tried to end his life more than once and is now in rehab...again. You know that there are people who love you and care for you and would do anything in their power to make you better. But you also know that you are the only one who can do that.
I've been wondering where you have been and right now, I wish you'd been away for any other reason but this. As my friend said to me today, "life sucks, surrounded by moments of pure joy". I can't begin to understand what you are going through, but I can understand what those around you are going through, and I hope and wish for peace and healing for all of you.
Once you heal, you can forgive yourself and move forward. I'm sending love and hugs and positive vibes for that to happen, but I guess we both know it's a hell of a mountain you need to climb now. xo
Hey @inquiringtimes, addiction of work is better than any other addiction of substance. You have to take some time off from work as well, whenever, there is a mind-block or you are physically tired. It's remarkable that you get decided to get back up and make things right for yourself. I think that is not selfish at all. :-) Make yourself happy and win the world. Cheers :-) And Steem on.
P.S. - Scanning your own feed and upvoting great content is more than enough. :-D Hope to see more such great articles from your side!
I consider you to be my friend and someone whom I respect because we share a lot of similarities. Sometimes when i read something like this that you wrote, i feel like i am reading my own diary. I think you will make it through this hard part of your life, and maybe begin to see the people who like and respect you. Your friends are waiting patiently.
I have some of these same things like pushing people away.......
I think you're a very talented writer, and you can make this superpower of yours even bigger.....there are few writers who are as good as you
Its interesting how connections form here. I could have never guessed we have so much in common when I first started reading your blog. <3 Thank you, Stella.
@inquiringtimes, thanks for sharing the reality of what's going on for you. I've only known you for a short time here but have really connected with your content and you know how that is - your content has made me feel akin to you. In any case, I'm so sorry it's been a rough time and addiction is such a beast to get out from under. @inquiringtimes
Hang in there man, life is hard but substance abuse makes it far harder, as you know. I'm sorry to hear you've been having such a hard time, but it's really good to hear you are looking up instead of down.
Keep moving.
I'll keep truckin' that's all I can do.
I am crying asshole! ♥
me too <3
My god man, glad you are still with us. I quit drinking 4 years ago, it had been a downward spiral for some time. It's helped me get back into my productive mental journeys. Also, I think a lot of people that enjoy online communication aren't really "social" in reality, because conservation can be so annoying and pointless at times, whereas you can always pick and choose and control your focus online. Anways, keep working on yourself and i'll keep working on myself, it's a life-long process. Peace
meanwhile, you're a total social butterfly on steemit. I see your comments everywhere :) doin it right!
Thanks for the kind words. I'm around, exploring some ideas in my head about what I'd like to write. I've been doing tooons of research on bitcoin and the cryptosphere historically, academically, thematically through the years, and actually understand some of how mining works now! :) I might write about that sometime since I already have a bunch of prep done.
I was also thinking about neuroplasticity... that would be a good topic for me to reserach and write about :)
as far as the other stuff.... well, I spend a majority of my time deep in work and research, which is a healthy way to re-train my brain, I think. Socially... uh... I've been in a "curl up into a ball" faze throughout the winter... now that the weather is nice, I'm starting to stretch and realize I can't just be a hermit forever... as much as that sounds appealing at times.
Peace
very cool,, yes and I don't even comment near as much as I used to. (-: gl with all the projects, should be an exciting year !!
Hi @inquiringtimes, thanks for sharing the reality of what's going on for you. I've only known you for a short time here but have really connected with your content and you know how that is - your content has made me feel akin to you. In any case, I'm so sorry it's been a rough time and addiction is such a beast to get out from under. Good for you for having the courage to take steps and embrace the kind support around you!
You'll have many rooting for you here on this platform- me included- and I wish you well in your emergence. I'd also like to offer the idea of using your friends here, and this forum to help support your process of growth rather than leaving it behind. Post as you can and as it's useful for you. It may not be a full living, but it helps and the potential for relationships and true connection does exist here. I now have several steemians in the flesh in my life and I like them just as much walking around as I did digitally. In some ways the kinds of connections we have here cuts through crap that stops us face to face, so we can connect more heart to heart rather than mask to mask. Anyway, just a thought. Be well and I look forward to more news from you.
Thank you. Yes, I still try to maintain some of the connections. Truth be told, I throw myself so strongly into everything that I do, that I simply don't have the time to throw myself into freelance, and keeping up a blog here. I will still be posting as available... in the future I may even re-emerge as a regular if I get more efficient at writing, or I've developed some other resources better.
Steem isn't going away. I feel good about the progress I made here so far, and I've still got plenty of sp so I'm not going to run out of bandwidth when I'm ready to hit the blog again.
Your past doesn't have to define your future @inquiringtimes. That is so true. And, your past may not be as bad as you think it was. It's all a question of perspective. When you feel shit it will look worse. When you feel better it won't look as bad.
I truly believe that you did the best you could with what you knew/thought at the time and will continue to do so.
Try and live one day at a time. Try and draw comfort from having a family that loves you without that having to mean that you need to do something different.
They obviously see something lovable in you and, while you may not be able to see that yourself, just trusting their judgement can bring it's own comfort.
I wish you all the best with whatever you choose to do now. 💙
Dan, it’s a precious act been aware and elaborate the past, doing it in this way is also a social act that maybe can help others thinking as well about their inner lives. From the moment I had the fortune to meeting you I felt comfortably speaking with you and understanding a different approach to the community. Also your attraction to learning is vibrant and contagious. Thanks for sharing and being present! Ciao!
My son tried to end his life more than once and is now in rehab...again. You know that there are people who love you and care for you and would do anything in their power to make you better. But you also know that you are the only one who can do that.
I've been wondering where you have been and right now, I wish you'd been away for any other reason but this. As my friend said to me today, "life sucks, surrounded by moments of pure joy". I can't begin to understand what you are going through, but I can understand what those around you are going through, and I hope and wish for peace and healing for all of you.
Once you heal, you can forgive yourself and move forward. I'm sending love and hugs and positive vibes for that to happen, but I guess we both know it's a hell of a mountain you need to climb now. xo
Hey @inquiringtimes, addiction of work is better than any other addiction of substance. You have to take some time off from work as well, whenever, there is a mind-block or you are physically tired. It's remarkable that you get decided to get back up and make things right for yourself. I think that is not selfish at all. :-) Make yourself happy and win the world. Cheers :-) And Steem on.
P.S. - Scanning your own feed and upvoting great content is more than enough. :-D Hope to see more such great articles from your side!