'Worldbuilding' – Comedy Open Mic Round 9

Hi my name is xXxShadowsOfAzraelxXx and im a riter i turn twelve next sunday
i was hoping to get critic on my fantasy epic i have worked very hard on this so no mean comments pls :-)

A long time ago in a super galaxy magic-verse of the world of Exodonius - of course this only one of the twenty multiverses and versions of Exodonius this happening to be Exodonius-nine and like other Exodonius worlds it was a giant orb carried in the talon of a cosmic eagle that flew through space

The world was of course created by the great god Marth-Debaetor and his magical powers are boundless even beyond the ninth circle of forbidden spells because he is the strongest god in the world

and of course after he created Exodonius he created humanity which opposed him because humanity had discovered that Marth-Debaetor was hoarding the power to himself and was not sharing the magic of the dark nymphs with him which made the king of Thalejindwenneesebbhen angry because his daughter died and he could not save him with their stupid dumbo magics and he needed the dark numph magics to revive her because he loved his daughter princess thot

so in 45. A.W. humanity waged war aginst their god and god ran away from them not coz he was afraid but coz he was ashamed of humanity he created.

Thalejindwenneesebbhen: We did it... We've saved humanity.

Soldier: My lod suddn betrauys

Thalejindwenneesebbhen: What ho

and then suddenly humanity alliance broke down because humans are greedy and evil so Thalejindwenneesebbhen coulndt revive his daurghter princess thot and several billion years passed and the main story begins with

John Smith who is a super powerful wizerd and is very handsome and is very tall and is rippsd and he beats up Matt from school because Matt is a dumbo and is ugly and stupid

*I nominate @Quoll @damianjayclay