Announcing "Ultimate Zoo Battle": A Tournament Style Deathmatch Between Zoo Animals!

in #comedy7 years ago

Is your tender, unassuming body ready for the event of the century? Enter the ruthless, brutal world of Ultimate Zoo Battle! Every day, two animals commonly found in a zoo will be pit against each other in a fight to the death! Which will emerge victorious?

YOU decide. Vote for which animal you want to win, and write a brief explanation of why you think it would emerge victorious. The decision will be made based on the crowd favorite, balanced against the quality of the reasoning given in support of one or the other combatant's victory.

The rules are simple. Two animals enter, one animal leaves. In matches between a land animal and aquatic animal, the battlefield will be flooded up to a height where both animals can move comfortably, or divided in half between a land and water area as necessary.

When the dust and blood settle, there will be only one remaining survivor, crowned the Grand Champion of Ultimate Zoo Battle. It begins tomorrow, so pick your favorite combatant now and begin devising strategies!


Stay Cozy!

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I vote for the komodo! His stealth skills deceive everyone's and he manages to strike just in the right time!

Yaay! This is going to be super fun! I am excited now to get this going.

I pick human, because he is a tricky bastard. Nothing can stop him.
He will tame elephant, tiger, shark and alligator and send them to clean the mess!

Penguin will be the ultimate winner... I m roaring for penguin... 😝😝😝

The dolphin will defeat the bee swarm. It will rape the bees to death.

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The cobra beats the ferret, the cobra can strike much faster on top of having venom. That is a one sided fight.

No way! Ferret has totally got this. They are ruthless. Haven't you ever seen Ricky Ticky Tavy??? He kicks so much cobra ass.

Chimpanzee and penguin, man that's not fair. Chimpanzee can beat the penguin with closed eyes.

That sound really exciting. It’s a brilliant idea. I’m curious what kind of animals there will be. Gorillas 🦍, sharks 🦈, lion 🦁, tigers 🐅?

It says which ones in the picture.

I just noticed. I think Baboon vs an alligator will be no brainer. Unless you put a gun into hi hands. lol coyote vs human? I guess humans belong in zoo as well. Not surprising.

Cannot wait! Please tell me there will be illustrations and descriptions depicting the battles.