Note to self: Say it with grace!

in #blog6 years ago
What could be the shortest word that you find difficult to say? For me, it has been my constant struggle for the past months at my work, where I find it very challenging word to utter.

NO.



It is just a two letter word but it seems to be toughest word for me to say. And most of you would agree for sure and some might disagree with me. Learning the art of saying it would require some time and more practice for me to deliver it politely with grace.

As always, I failed again to live up to declining to a client’s request. For the past months, I have been saying yes to each customer and assist them in expense of my time outside working hours. I just couldn’t say no most especially if they have valid reason and most of them is because they are having the same working hours as mine. I actually do not regret saying yes to clients most especially if they also value the extra hours I have waited and spent with them. However, there are these clients who seems to think the opposite and they are few who seems to be unpolite.

Today, I said yes to the client who made me wait for 30 minutes and does not show up. He didn’t bother to text me prior to the said time. What makes me feel pissed is the messaged he sent me. Actually this is not the first time I gave in to his request of waiting for him beyond office hours.

Extending beyond working hours is not a big issue for me, what strikes me is it affects my responsibilities outside work. Time is indeed valuable. If you are working mom who does not have a helper in the house, you would understand. I hope he understands that!

Two reasons where I find it difficult to say it.

  • Customers has a valid reasons and urgent need.
  • Customers tends to be unhappy after declining their request.(so I end up saying yes)
When you say ‘Yes’ to others, make sure you are not saying ‘No’ to yourself. ~Paulo Coehlo


Because I said yes once, he expected yes to every instance he can’t make it on time. He didn’t even bother to ask me if it is fine with me to wait for him despite reminding him of our working hours. He is the type of person that every time we meet, most of the things he would share about his work seems negative all the time. So, I always thought being kind to a person who seems to be having a dark day would be enough reason to brighten up his day.

Note to self

I should not feel guilty all the time when there is a need to decline a request. I should not let a single yes be the bridge to more yeses if it is not convenient for me. I should learn to assert more and practice declining in a polite way. I should always be clear when I give in to a request, it is only just for this time.

There might be some of you who are having the same problem like me, please let me know how you managed to decline a request without sounding harsh or disappointing a customer.

All photos taken using my iPhone

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The only one I have a hard time saying no to is myself, frankly enough. Sometimes I want to do things that I know I shouldn't. My mind says no but my body says it is so.

For someone who fasts, I have gotten ridiculously weak to food, something that I definitively must get in control.

There must also be a mention that saying "No" becomes diminished if you say "No, but....". Happens to me a lot.

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