How I Got Here

I spent a good portion of my life, trying to please other people. I often lay awake at night, thinking, is she/he upset with me or, did I do something wrong? I wanted everyone to like me.

After many years of feeling unhappy, and feeling like I was letting others control my life, I gradually began to realize that I was the Captain of this ship, and that's when I started throwing people overboard! First my neighbour, then my boyfriend. My workplace too!

I spent many years suffering from insomnia. I realize now I was looking for something outside myself, when really all I needed was within me. Many experiences in my life, including an aloof father, losing my Mom when she was too young, and many relationships that ended abruptly and for no apparent reason, made me realize that I was meant to be alone for a reason. It's funny but when you come to certain realizations, there is a sudden shift in your reality, and one day, the reason for those realizations disappears. I know not everybody will understand what I mean by this.

"What you resist, persists"- Neale Donald Walsch