When Change Makers Are Labeled Trouble Makers: The Absence of Discord is not the Presence of Peace…

I’ve frequently been labeled a trouble maker because I’ve dared to challenge authority and the status quo, and that is fine by me. I would much rather die a trouble maker who stood for something than live as a conformist who fell for everything.

I’ve noticed that a lot of Midwesterners avoid conflict like it is the bubonic plague, and if anyone attempts to spur an uncomfortable conversation there are always calls for “peace” or “coming together” or some other tone police-y silencing method. But why? And, I guess more importantly, why do people heed these calls? From what I’ve noticed, its because of social pressure relating to cycles of socialization and the general predisposition to view people who upset the cycles of socialization or “tried and true” systems as trouble makers. By labeling people as “trouble makers”, rather than change makers, society shames them into silence.

Starting from birth we are taught to take our place in society based on our cultural norms and social status, girls are given pink, caretaking toys and boys are given blue, manly things. This messaging is then perpetuated throughout our lives often functioning on a subconscious level because we are first socialized by people that we know, love and trust through a strong set of rules, roles, and assumptions that shape our sense of self and our sense of the world. This masterful method of socialization is so engrained in our society that it is virtually undetectable…to those who receive the benefits of socialization.

As we navigate life in our respective “worlds”, depending on where you are on the scales of different treatment; if you receive the benefit of socialization, you may not notice that the rules aren’t fair. If you are penalized by the rules, you are keenly aware of their fairness. I will speak from my personal perspective as a black woman, I definitely notice the unfairness of the American cycle of socialization. On May 5, 1962, at the funeral of an unarmed black man shot and killed by the police, Malcolm X said, “The most disrespected woman in America, is the black woman. The most un-protected person in America is the black woman. The most neglected person in America, is the black woman.” 56 years later, this is still true today and this scenario still occurs and it still occurs because the people in positions of power are benefitting from the cycles of socialization, and as such, the system doesn’t seem so bad to them.

In his Letter from the Birmingham Jail, Martin Luther King Jr. stated, “First, I must confess that over the last few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Council-er or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I can’t agree with your methods of direct action;” who paternalistically feels he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by the myth of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait until a “more convenient season.”

Shallow understanding from people of goodwill is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection."

America has so many systems that were built for the sole use of white people, when the laws changed, they were forced to allow non-whites to use these systems, however the systems have never been altered to accommodate different cultures because we seem to place a high value on conformity and assimilation. In these contexts, that means that non-white people, are expected to conform to the standards associated with white culture, or be punished. People who go against the grain are penalized for independent thinking. They are the troublemakers, not the system that perpetuates structural and institutional inequality. This perception has been normalized through systems of socialization which discourage us from questioning the status quo for fear of being impolite. So, for fear of being impolite, we should allow our own dehumanization and disenfranchisement? We’ve seen what patience and politeness brings, more of the same, if you don’t act to interrupt the cycles, you are silently participating.

On my door I have a sign that says “Do What’s Right, Not What’s Easy” as a reminder to not allow myself to remain silent in the face of injustice. But sometimes, it’s hard to ALWAYS be the person pointing out the flaws within systems and structures that function to silence and marginalize people that look like me. I’d like to make this call to action for all of those who view your silence as polite to stand by me and support us as we change systems to fit the people within them rather than attempt to change people to fit within the system.